Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrate information how the jobs are containing in four different sectors are changing the economy of the United States, the period between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, America having the multiple sectors which is Health sector and Retail field saw a growth in jobs, Manufacturing field having highest jobs while starting of the period and end of the period is quite decline

and the final sector Agriculture seen very low jobs.

Firstly, Manufacturing sector is the highest jobs procuring field in the 1960 along with 15 million jobs while the following 1980 it reached to 20 million and after 2000 to 2020 continuous decline its reached to approximately 13 million. Significantly as same as Agriculture sector stared with the along 6 million jobs with continuing drop to 3 million from 1980 to 2000, by end of the year 2020 it stable at 2.2 million jobs only. Moreover, Healthcare and Retail sectors performed very strong by continuous growth from 1960 to 2020 with same job holdings with 15.5 millions approximately.

By contrast, Health and retail sectors are the major contribution for the economy throwing in the United States.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the growth in Healthcare and Retail and the decline in Manufacturing and Agriculture. However, the overview is somewhat disjointed and lacks clarity. The data reporting is generally accurate, but some figures are imprecise or confusingly presented, such as the claim that Healthcare and Retail held the same number of jobs throughout the period. The response addresses the task requirements, but the lack of a clear, cohesive overview and some inaccuracies in data interpretation prevent it from reaching a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is hampered by awkward phrasing and limited use of cohesive devices. While some linking words like 'Firstly' and 'Moreover' are used, they are often followed by sentences that lack clear internal structure. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the progression of ideas feels mechanical rather than natural. The final paragraph is particularly weak, as it repeats information already mentioned without adding new insight or providing a strong concluding summary of the trends.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The range of vocabulary is limited and repetitive. Phrases such as 'jobs procuring field' and 'jobs holdings' are unnatural and indicate a lack of control over collocations. There are also errors in word choice, such as 'stared' instead of 'started' and 'throwing in' which is used incorrectly. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the vocabulary is not sufficiently precise or varied to support a higher score. To improve, you should focus on learning topic-specific collocations related to data description, such as 'upward trend' or 'significant decline'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('America having', 'Agriculture seen'), tense usage ('stared with the along'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or run-on, lacking the necessary complexity and accuracy for higher bands. While the reader can understand the general message, the high frequency of errors in basic sentence construction and verb forms is a significant limitation. You need to focus on mastering basic sentence patterns and ensuring consistent tense usage when describing historical data.

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