Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph here states about the number of jobs gaining or loosing demand in different sectors of US,from the year [redacted phone]. between the year 1960 & 1980 the manufacturing jobs went up from 15 million to 20 million but in the next 40 years the graph is coming down around 13 million.the dashed line shows the retail jobs from year 1960 to 2020 the graph is constantly going upward but in last 20 years it is ranging around 15 million.the other line of healthcare jobs is seeking demand from the year 1960 to 2020.this sector gained 12.5 million jobs from the starting year to till 2020, & the last line representing the agriculture jobs and the bar clearly showing the less demand of these jobs from the starting year.overall the healthcare & retail job are most demanding from year [redacted phone] and the remaining others are being less demanded year by year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors mentioned in the graph and provides a general overview. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For instance, describing the manufacturing trend as 'coming down around 13 million' lacks precision, and the description of agriculture as having 'less demand' is vague. The report would benefit from more specific data points and a clearer comparison between the sectors. While the main features are identified, the lack of a clear, structured summary and the reliance on informal phrasing ('the graph here states') limits the effectiveness of the response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is written as a single paragraph, which makes it difficult to follow. There is a lack of logical progression between the different sectors, and the use of cohesive devices is very limited. Phrases like 'the other line' and 'the last line' are repetitive and mechanical. To improve, you should use separate paragraphs for different trends and employ a wider range of linking words (e.g., 'In contrast,' 'Furthermore,' 'Meanwhile') to guide the reader through the data more effectively.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive. You frequently use the word 'graph' and 'jobs' without much variation. Phrases like 'gaining or loosing demand' and 'seeking demand' are not standard collocations in this context. There are also issues with word choice, such as using 'demanding' when you mean 'popular' or 'prevalent'. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise terminology related to trends, such as 'fluctuated,' 'remained stable,' or 'experienced a significant decline.'

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains several grammatical errors, including inconsistent capitalization (e.g., 'the dashed line'), missing articles, and punctuation issues. Sentence structures are mostly simple, and there is a lack of complex sentence forms. For example, 'the graph is constantly going upward but in last 20 years it is ranging around 15 million' is a run-on sentence that lacks proper punctuation. Improving your control over sentence boundaries and ensuring subject-verb agreement will significantly enhance the clarity of your writing.

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