Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-24
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The information about the variety of jobs in four sectors in the economy in US during 1960 and 2020 is depicted by line graph.
Overall, The highest number of jobs available in manufacturing sector. whereas, Agriculture has the least jobs according to the given data.
It can be vividly seen that Healthcare sector provided jobs near about 2 million in US. This figure showed incline and reached to 5 million in 1980. However, This numbers were increasing rapidly and hit the peak point in 2020 with 17 million jobs. As this figure was highest in the given graph. Whereas, The Agriculture sector had started with 6 million jobs in 1960. The number of jobs that were provided during 1980 and 2000 was 4 million and 3 million respectively. Further, This figure dramatically decline and stood at below 2 million in 2020.
Moving towards the rest of the information, In Retail sector had provided near about 6 millions jobs in 1960. However, This figure increased to 10 millions after 20 years. These number showed sharply incline and reached at peak point with 15 millions jobs. Further. To the manufacturing sector it's figure stood at 15 millions in 1960. After reaching at 20 millions in 1980, It showed
drastically decline and reached at 12 millions in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends, such as the growth in the healthcare sector and the decline in agriculture. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate; stating that manufacturing had the highest number of jobs overall is misleading, as the healthcare sector surpassed it by 2020. The summary of data is generally clear, but some figures are presented in a way that lacks precision, and the comparison between sectors could be more effectively highlighted to meet the requirements of a higher band. The response successfully reports the main features as requested.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is hindered by frequent punctuation errors and awkward sentence transitions. For example, the use of 'Further.' as a standalone sentence fragment disrupts the flow. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'However' and 'Whereas', but they are often placed incorrectly or used with faulty grammar (e.g., 'Whereas, The Agriculture sector...'). Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the paragraphing is somewhat mechanical. While the overall progression is discernible, the lack of control over cohesive devices and punctuation prevents a higher score.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the student to describe trends (e.g., 'incline', 'peak point', 'dramatically decline'). However, there are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'near about', 'these number', and 'it's figure'. The repetition of basic structures and the misuse of pluralisation (e.g., '10 millions') indicate a limited control over lexical precision. While the meaning is generally clear, the vocabulary lacks the sophistication and accuracy required for a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence attempts, but there is a high frequency of grammatical errors. Common issues include incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement errors (e.g., 'This numbers were increasing'), and persistent punctuation mistakes, such as unnecessary capitalisation after commas and periods. The misuse of articles and prepositions is also frequent. While the student attempts to use complex structures, the high density of errors often distracts the reader, though the message remains understandable. Greater attention to basic sentence construction and proofreading is necessary.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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