Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph compares the number of employment opportunities in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, manufacturing is the dominant sector of all the categories, while agriculture remained the least common. Meanwhile, Retail and healthcare recorded an Increased trend, manufacturing and agriculture experience a fall.

In 1960, manufacturing was the top most industry with 15 million jobs available, which rose gradually to its peak at 20 million before fell down to nearly 17 million job opportunities available in the sector. Moving further, retail was the second most popular sector regarding availability of work,it rose sharply from 6 million opportunities to 15 million in 2000 before reaching at its peak at around 16 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. While you have identified the main trends for manufacturing and retail, you have completely omitted the data for agriculture and healthcare, which were required to provide a full summary of the graph. The overview is present but lacks the necessary detail to be considered well-developed. To improve, ensure you cover all four categories provided in the prompt and provide a more comprehensive analysis of the data points to reach the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Meanwhile', and 'Moving further'. However, the flow is somewhat mechanical. The transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is acceptable, but the lack of information regarding two of the sectors makes the overall progression feel incomplete. The use of referencing is generally clear, but the paragraphing could be more balanced if all data points were included and discussed in a structured manner.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, with terms like 'dominant sector', 'employment opportunities', and 'rose sharply'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and phrasing, such as 'top most industry' (should be 'leading industry') and 'before fell down' (should be 'before falling'). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic descriptors. To achieve a higher band, try to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plateaued', or 'experienced a marginal decline'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'manufacturing and agriculture experience a fall' should be in the past tense ('experienced'). There are also issues with verb forms, such as 'before fell down' instead of 'before falling' and 'reaching at its peak' (the preposition 'at' is unnecessary). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some run-on sentences and missing spaces after commas. Improving control over verb tenses and preposition usage is essential for a higher score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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