Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
the illustrated line graph shows the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between the year 1960 to 2020.
the line graph also shows the information about the sectors such as the manufacturing, retail, agriculture and the healthcare, these are the four main sectors the line graph provides information about.
in the graph with the 15 million people who worked in manufacturing sector in the year of 1960, but this number is slightly decreased between the 10 to 15 million.
the most stable growth is shown by the retail sector. in the year of 1960, it has nearly 5 million workers but eventually increased to the 15 million in the year of 2020.
the healthcare sector is the have the greatest number of increased jobs from the year 1996 to 2020. in the year 1996 the healthcare sector has only 2 million jobs but it time after time it increased and in the year 2020 it has the highest jobs in the entire line graph.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, such as the trends in manufacturing, retail, and healthcare. However, the description of the agriculture sector is missing entirely, which is a significant omission. The overview is also lacking; a summary should highlight the most significant trends (e.g., the overall growth in healthcare versus the decline in manufacturing) rather than just listing data points. The data provided is sometimes imprecise, such as describing the manufacturing trend as 'slightly decreased between the 10 to 15 million,' which is confusing and does not accurately reflect the data points on the graph. To improve, ensure all categories are addressed and provide a clear, high-level summary of the trends.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response lacks a clear structure. It is written as a series of disconnected sentences rather than cohesive paragraphs. There is a lack of logical progression between ideas, and the use of cohesive devices is very limited. For example, the transition between the introduction and the body is abrupt, and there are no linking words to guide the reader through the comparisons (e.g., 'in contrast,' 'meanwhile,' 'subsequently'). The paragraphing is also insufficient, as the entire response is essentially one block of text. To improve, use transition signals to connect sentences and group related information into distinct paragraphs.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive. Phrases like 'the line graph also shows the information about' and 'in the year of' are used repeatedly, which limits the range. There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'the healthcare sector is the have the greatest number of increased jobs,' which is grammatically and lexically incorrect. The response relies on simple vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'increased' or 'highest,' without using more precise academic alternatives like 'fluctuated,' 'surpassed,' or 'experienced a steady rise.' Expanding your vocabulary to include trend-specific verbs and nouns will help improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'the illustrated line graph shows the information about... between the year 1960 to 2020' (incorrect preposition use) and 'the healthcare sector is the have the greatest number' (incorrect verb structure). The sentence structures are mostly simple, with very few attempts at complex sentences. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing capital letters at the start of sentences. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of prepositions for time and data descriptions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.