Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

This chart illustrates the changes total number of jobs in the United States economy from the year 1960 to 2020. This chart specifically focuses on the four sectors on the country's economy.

Overall, this chart depicts the trends in the four US sectors of the economy. We can notice that retail and healthcare sectors had a massive growth. Whereas the manufacturing and agriculture had a steady decline in the jobs created.

Moreover, We can quantify that in the year 1960, 15 million jobs were created in the manufacturing sector, which was the highest at the time. We can see that the manufacturing sector had a steady decline from the year 1980. The retail sector and agriculture sector had similar number of jobs which was around 6 million. Although retail sector has seen a stable growth, the agricultural sector failed to create more jobs. Healthcare sector had the lowest recorded jobs that year. However this sector has seen a massive growth since.

Here we can see that although 1980 was a crucial year for the growth of all the sectors, agriculture sector failed to create more jobs. It looks like manufacturing and agriculture sector should be focused more, so that they provide more number of jobs in the future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response provides a clear overview of the trends, identifying the growth in retail and healthcare and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the task requires an objective summary of data. The final sentence, 'It looks like manufacturing and agriculture sector should be focused more,' is subjective and inappropriate for an Academic Task 1 report, which should remain neutral. Additionally, some data points are described vaguely (e.g., 'around 6 million'), and the report lacks a precise comparison of the final figures in 2020, which is essential for a high-scoring response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'Moreover,' 'Although,' and 'However' are used to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and the referencing is sometimes repetitive. The transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is clear, but the final paragraph introduces personal opinion rather than continuing the objective analysis of the data, which disrupts the logical progression of the report.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with terms like 'illustrates,' 'trends,' 'quantify,' and 'steady decline' used correctly. However, there is a lack of variety and some minor inaccuracies in collocation. For instance, 'massive growth' is used twice, and 'failed to create more jobs' is slightly repetitive. To achieve a higher band, you should incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to data trends, such as 'fluctuated,' 'peaked,' or 'remained stagnant,' rather than relying on simpler descriptive phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('the' total number, 'the' retail sector) and issues with subject-verb agreement ('retail and agriculture sector had similar number'). The phrase 'the changes total number of jobs' is grammatically incorrect. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. More attention to articles and pluralisation would improve the accuracy.

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