Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the plenty of employment in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Manufacturing was leading from the front which lost it's position in 2010, While Retail and healthcare experienced a big increase and leads them on top at the end of the year. However, agriculture is the only sector that made a significant steady decrease over the years.

If we look at manufacturing sector, it was the highest number of jobs in 1960 and that is 15million which also leads for almost 2000. However, it faces significant decrease which made them a 3rd on the rank. On the other hand, Agriculture was the 3rd most jobs in 1960. Although, It has went down steadily at the end of the year of 2020 with a number of around two million people.

In 1960, number of people in retail and healthcare are around two million and six million respectively, which got a surge and surpassed manufacturing sector in 2004. Both retail and healthcare sector met equally in the time of mid 2000 and 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the decline in manufacturing and agriculture and the growth in retail and healthcare. However, the reporting of data is occasionally imprecise or confusing, such as the phrase 'leads for almost 2000' and the vague description of the mid-2000s. While the overview is present, it lacks a clear, professional tone. To improve, ensure that data points are cited accurately and that the summary highlights the most significant shifts more clearly, rather than just listing changes.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'If we look at manufacturing sector' and 'Although, It has went down'. The referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly when referring to 'them' or 'it' without a clear antecedent. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would help the flow of the response significantly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are several instances of imprecise word choice and awkward phrasing, such as 'illustrates the plenty of employment' and 'leads them on top'. The term 'met equally' is also not the most natural way to describe intersecting data points. While the range is sufficient to communicate the main ideas, more precise academic vocabulary (e.g., 'downward trend', 'surpassed', 'fluctuated') would elevate the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'it lost it's position' (incorrect use of apostrophe), 'It has went down' (incorrect verb tense), and 'number of people in retail and healthcare are' (subject-verb agreement). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focusing on verb tense consistency and basic punctuation would be beneficial.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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