Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates the jobs in four economic sectors of the US between the years 1960 and 2020. The number of jobs is shown in millions.
Overall, both agriculture and retail were at their lowest in the beginning and rose to the highest point by the end of the period. On the contrary, manufacturing sector underwent a huge decline.
In the year 1960, manufacturing industry has the most number of jobs of 15 million. Later, from 1980 it encountered downfall and reached 13 million in 2020. In the same year jobs in agricultural sector slowly lowered, Healthcare skyrocketed to the highest jobs of 16 million.
Although retail and agriculture industries were at the same point in the start, their trends were opposite. Retail industry peaked to 13 million similar to agriculture sector . However, agriculture had many fluctuations and further collapsed to 2 million jobs by the end of the period consisting the least number of jobs among all four sectors.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, but there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, you state that agriculture and retail were at their lowest at the beginning and rose to the highest point, which contradicts the visual data showing agriculture declining significantly. Additionally, you mention that manufacturing had 15 million jobs in 1960, but the graph shows a different trend. The summary of the 'Healthcare' sector is also problematic as it is not clearly defined in the provided image. To improve, ensure you carefully cross-reference your descriptions with the actual data points on the axes to avoid factual errors.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. There is a clear progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly confusing, such as the transition 'On the contrary' used to introduce the manufacturing sector. The referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly when comparing the trends of the four sectors. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that the relationships between the different sectors are clearly articulated for the reader.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'skyrocketed', 'fluctuations', and 'collapsed'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'most number of jobs' (should be 'highest number of jobs') and 'consisting the least number of jobs' (should be 'accounting for the least'). While these errors do not impede communication, they limit the precision of your writing. To improve, focus on learning common collocations used in data description, such as 'a significant decline' or 'a steady increase'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'manufacturing industry has the most number' (tense inconsistency) and 'from 1980 it encountered downfall' (missing article). Additionally, there is a punctuation error in 'agriculture sector .' and a missing subject in 'consisting the least number of jobs'. While these errors are noticeable, they do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles when describing trends.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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