Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph provides details regarding the number of employment in four areas of economy in the US within the space of about 7 centuries.

In general, agriculture became the lowest as the time went on while healthcare and retail became the highest.

Manufacturing had the highest rate of work in 1960 at around 15 million then rose significantly to 20 million in 1980 but later started fluctuating the same year and ended up below healthcare and retail in 2020. Furthermore, retail which was the second started increasing in job and became the highest in 2020 at about 16 million.

However, agriculture that was on the same frequency with retail depreciated to below 5 million making it the lowest. Additionally, health care went from being the lowest with about 3 million to around 21 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have identified the main trends, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For example, the statement '7 centuries' is factually incorrect based on the provided data (1960-2020 is 60 years). You have highlighted the key sectors, but the lack of sufficient detail and the failure to reach the required length means the task is only partially addressed. To improve, ensure you provide a more comprehensive overview and include more specific data points to support your comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the logical progression is sometimes hindered by imprecise language, such as 'on the same frequency' and 'depreciated'. While you use some cohesive devices like 'In general', 'Furthermore', and 'However', the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical. The referencing is generally clear, but the overall structure would benefit from more sophisticated linking words to connect the trends in the four sectors more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for higher bands. There are some awkward word choices, such as 'number of employment' (should be 'number of jobs' or 'employment levels') and 'depreciated' (which is typically used for currency or assets, not job numbers). You also made a significant error in the introduction by stating '7 centuries' instead of '6 decades'. To improve, focus on using more accurate terminology for describing trends, such as 'declined', 'surged', or 'remained stable'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. For instance, 'agriculture became the lowest' is grammatically incomplete (lowest what?), and 'retail which was the second started increasing in job' is awkward. There are also issues with article usage and prepositional phrases. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to lower the score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and ensuring that your comparisons are grammatically complete.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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