Band 8.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 8.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 8.0)
The line graph illustrates the amount of jobs in four sectors namely Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare of the US economy, over the period of sixty years 1960 to 2020.
Overall, employment in manufacturing and agriculture declined over the period, whereas retail and, most strikingly, healthcare grew substantially. As a result, the sector that dominated in 1960 had been overtaken by the end.
In 1960, manufacturing was by far the largest employer, with around 15 million jobs, and it continued to rise to a peak of roughly 20 million by 1980. After that, however, it fell steadily, dropping to about 13 million by 2020. Agriculture, meanwhile, was already small at 6 million in 1960 and shrank further to just 2 million, remaining the smallest sector throughout.
The rising sectors told the opposite story. Retail climbed steadily from 6 million to around 16 million, while healthcare showed the most dramatic growth of all, soaring from just 2 million in 1960 to roughly 16 million by 2020. By the end of the period, retail and healthcare had become the joint-largest employers, each overtaking a much-reduced manufacturing sector.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 8.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 8.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 8.0 |
| Overall | 8.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.0
The response is excellent and fully addresses all parts of the task. You have provided a clear overview that captures the main trends, such as the decline in manufacturing and agriculture and the growth in retail and healthcare. The selection of data is accurate, and you have made relevant comparisons, such as noting that the sector that dominated in 1960 was overtaken by 2020. The key features are well-highlighted, and the information is logically grouped, making the data easy to follow. You have successfully identified the 'dramatic growth' in healthcare and the 'steady' decline in manufacturing, which demonstrates a strong grasp of the visual information provided.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The response is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a distinct focus: the introduction and overview, the declining sectors, and the growing sectors. You have used cohesive devices effectively, such as 'whereas', 'as a result', 'meanwhile', and 'by the end of the period', which help to guide the reader through the data. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the transition between the declining and rising sectors is smooth. The information is presented in a way that is easy to follow, and the use of referencing is precise throughout the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 8.0
You have used a wide range of vocabulary with precision and natural control. Phrases such as 'most strikingly', 'soaring', 'shrank further', and 'joint-largest employers' demonstrate a sophisticated command of language suitable for an academic report. The word choices are accurate and contribute to the clarity of the analysis. There are no noticeable errors in spelling or word choice, and the vocabulary is varied enough to avoid repetition while maintaining a formal, academic tone throughout the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.0
The response displays a wide range of grammatical structures with high accuracy. You have successfully used complex sentences, such as 'The line graph illustrates the amount of jobs... over the period of sixty years', and 'By the end of the period, retail and healthcare had become the joint-largest employers, each overtaking a much-reduced manufacturing sector.' The majority of your sentences are error-free, and the punctuation is used correctly to support the flow of information. The control over tense usage, particularly the shift between past and present perfect, is handled well to describe the historical data.
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