Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of employments in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare sectors of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, the graph demonstrates retail and agricultural jobs faced steady growth whereas manufacturing jobs declined rapidly over the period. Additionally, healthcare jobs in first two decade had declined while keeping a steady balance in all upcoming years.
The graph shows, manufacturing jobs accounted for 15 millions in 1960 which soared to 20 million in 1980 later dropping to somewhat 13 million in 2020. Likewise, healthcare jobs declined from accounting a little over than 6 millions in 1960 to less than 5 million in 1980. However, healthcare sector maintained this steady balance throughout the given period making this the least contributing in the economy.
Subsequently, retail and agricultural jobs started off with a little over than 5 millions and approximately 3 millions in 1960 respectively. The figure then faced an upward trend and later finished off at just little over than 15 millions in 2020 making these two job sector accounted for highest contribution in the economy of US.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response provides a clear overview of the main trends, identifying the growth in retail and agriculture and the decline in manufacturing. However, there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, you state that healthcare jobs declined from 1960 to 1980 and remained the least contributing, whereas the graph shows healthcare jobs actually increasing steadily throughout the period. Additionally, the description of manufacturing trends contains inaccuracies regarding the specific figures. While the main features are selected, the lack of precision in interpreting the data points prevents a higher score. Ensure you double-check the axes and data labels before drafting your summary.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Additionally', 'Likewise', and 'Subsequently' are used to link ideas. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes hindered by the factual inaccuracies mentioned in the task achievement section. Paragraphing is appropriate, and the transition between the general overview and the specific details is clear. To improve, ensure that the logical flow is supported by accurate data interpretation, as incorrect information can make the progression of the argument feel disjointed.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'soared', 'upward trend', and 'contributing'. However, there are some awkward collocations and word choice errors, such as 'number of employments' (should be 'number of jobs' or 'employment levels') and 'first two decade' (should be 'first two decades'). The phrase 'somewhat 13 million' is also non-standard. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, more precise and natural phrasing would elevate the response to a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('these two job sector accounted for') and article usage ('in first two decade'). Prepositional errors are also present, such as 'a little over than 6 millions' (should be 'a little over 6 million'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency of the writing. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy would be highly beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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