Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the employment of four field of the economy in the US over the period from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is evident that agriculture and the manufacturing faced continuous decline with the time whereas the most significant changes observed in retail and healthcare which increased with respect to time.

At the beginning of period, Manufacturing stood at 15 million compared with Retail at 6 million. Over the following years, Manufacturing decreased steadily in 2020. Meanwhile, Retail experienced a opposite trend by climbing up in graph.

Turning to the remaining categories, Agriculture recorded 6 million in 1960 meanwhile, Healthcare started it from 3 million. From 1960 onwards healthcare sector continues to rise and stopped at 16 million in 2020. Meanwhile, agriculture fluctuated downside and finished at 3 million.

By the end of period Healthcare and retailing reached on top whereas Agriculture and Manufacturing faced large downfall which shows the interest of young generation that in which field they are more interested.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the decline in manufacturing and agriculture and the growth in retail and healthcare. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For example, the statement 'Manufacturing decreased steadily in 2020' is vague and lacks specific data points to support the trend. Additionally, the final sentence introduces personal speculation ('which shows the interest of young generation') which is not supported by the graph and is irrelevant to a factual report. To improve, ensure all claims are backed by specific figures from the graph and avoid adding external opinions.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Meanwhile', 'Turning to', and 'At the beginning of period', though some are used mechanically or with minor grammatical errors (e.g., 'at the beginning of period' should be 'at the beginning of the period'). The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs could be smoother. The referencing is mostly clear, though the structure of the final paragraph is slightly disjointed due to the inclusion of irrelevant commentary.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, using terms like 'illustrates', 'continuous decline', 'fluctuated', and 'downfall'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'four field of the economy' (should be 'four sectors') and 'fluctuated downside' (should be 'fluctuated downwards' or 'showed a downward trend'). The phrase 'reached on top' is also non-standard. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including missing articles ('at the beginning of period'), incorrect prepositions ('in 2020' instead of 'by 2020'), and awkward phrasing ('Healthcare started it from 3 million'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency. To reach a higher band, focus on consistent article usage, correct prepositional phrases for time, and ensuring subject-verb agreement.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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