Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In 1960, Healthcare jobs was in between 0-5 millions and hitted to 5 million by the year 1980,After that It pumped to 12 million in the year 2000, In 2020 healthcare jobs reached above 15 million. 6 million job of agriculture in the year 1960 Dropped down in 1980 and same on 2000 , It Slightly Bow down a little bit in the year 2020.

Retail jobs took a huge place by moving from 1960 to 2000 by 5 to 10 to 15 million and in last moved to 16 million by the year 2020. Manufacturing was on 15 million and changed it’s position to 20 million in the year 1980, then tried but failed and dropped to 13 Million in the last 2020.

In Conclusion, there is visible in this chart that manufacturing was on trend and agriculture dropped down in between 1960 to 2020, So it’s observed that manufacturing jobs took a huge place and agriculture jobs just never get chance to glow.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers all four sectors, but the reporting of data is often inaccurate or vague. For example, stating that healthcare jobs were 'in between 0-5 millions' in 1960 is imprecise. The overview provided in the conclusion is weak, as it fails to highlight the most significant trends clearly, such as the overall growth in retail or the decline in agriculture. The summary lacks a clear focus on the main features and comparisons, which are essential for a high band score in Task 1. The analysis is somewhat superficial, focusing on individual data points rather than synthesizing the information into a cohesive report.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inappropriate, such as 'In Conclusion' to introduce a summary that repeats information rather than synthesizing it. Referencing is often unclear, and the transition between sentences feels abrupt. While there is a basic structure, the lack of logical flow between the data points makes the report difficult to follow. More varied linking words and better paragraph structure would improve the coherence significantly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often inappropriate for an academic report. Phrases like 'hitted to', 'pumped to', 'Bow down', and 'never get chance to glow' are informal and inaccurate in this context. There is a lack of precise terminology for describing trends (e.g., 'increased', 'fluctuated', 'declined'). The student relies on basic verbs and struggles to use academic collocations effectively. To improve, the student should focus on learning standard vocabulary for describing graphs and charts, such as 'experienced a steady rise' or 'witnessed a sharp decline'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('Healthcare jobs was', 'agriculture... Dropped down'), incorrect verb forms ('hitted', 'get chance'), and punctuation errors. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in errors that impede clarity. For instance, 'Retail jobs took a huge place by moving from 1960 to 2000 by 5 to 10 to 15 million' is syntactically confusing. A greater focus on basic sentence construction and proofreading for tense consistency is required.

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