Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the information about the availability of jobs across four domains of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020. Overall, the number of jobs has declined in the manufactuing department, whereas, an increase can be seen in the number of jobs across regional and healthcare sectors. The vacancies in the agriculture sector remained the same.
In 1980, 20 million jobs were available in the manufacturing department and the least number of jobs were available in the agriculture department, just lower than 3 million in 2020. In the manufacturing sector, the number of jobs reached at its highest pointin 1980, then experienced a sudden fall from year 1980 to 2020. From 1960 to 2020, the number of jobs increased in the retail sector, from around 5 million to just above 15 million. The healthcare sector also showed a rapid incline in number of jobs between 1980 to 2020 and reached the same point as the retail department. In agriculture department, the availability of seats remained constant from year 1980 to 2000, and slightly decreased in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying trends across the four sectors. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate; for instance, it mentions an increase in 'regional' sectors, which is not a category listed in the graph, and it claims agriculture remained the same, whereas the data shows a slight decline. The reporting of data points is generally accurate, but the lack of precision in the overview and the inclusion of non-existent categories prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure that the overview captures the most significant trends (e.g., the divergence between manufacturing and service-based sectors) and verify all labels against the provided data.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. There is a clear progression of ideas, and the use of cohesive devices such as 'whereas', 'in 1980', and 'from 1960 to 2020' helps guide the reader. However, the transition between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the paragraphing could be more balanced. The reference to 'regional' sectors is confusing as it does not correspond to the graph labels, which impacts the clarity of the overall structure. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring consistent terminology would enhance the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with terms like 'availability of jobs', 'declined', and 'rapid incline' used appropriately. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'manufacturing department' (sector is more appropriate) and 'availability of seats' (which is an odd collocation for job numbers). There are also minor spelling errors like 'manufactuing' and 'pointin'. To reach a higher band, you should use more precise terminology related to economic trends and ensure that collocations are natural and accurate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'reached at its highest point' (should be 'reached its highest point') and 'in number of jobs' (missing an article). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are minor slips throughout. The range of structures is sufficient to convey the information, but more complex sentence forms could be used to demonstrate greater control. Focusing on article usage and prepositional accuracy will help improve the overall grammatical precision.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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