Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates data about the number of employments created by four US economic sectors from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the retail and healthcare showed a significant upward trend throughout the period, while, the agriculture sector had the lowest figures. Meanwhile, The Manufacturing industry peaked during initial couple of decades, before a sharp decline.

At the beginning the Manufacturing industry was the largest sector with 15 million jobs and peaked with a figure of 20 million, which declined to around 13 million in 2020. The agriculture sector experienced a substantial drop during initial couple of decades, then remained steady from 1960 to 2000. A minimal decline occurred in next 20 years. It started with 6 million jobs and finished off at 3 million approximately.

The Healthcare and the retail sectors started with approximately 2.5 and 6 million jobs, rose with almost same rate having figures of 5 million and 10 million in 1980. Both sectors surpassed manufacturing industry and converged in 2020 with the number of around 16 million employments.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all key features of the graph, including the overall trends and specific data points for the four sectors. You successfully identified the main trends, such as the growth in healthcare and retail versus the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. The overview is clear and provides a good summary of the data. To reach a higher band, ensure that all data points are accurate; for instance, the manufacturing sector peaked at 20 million, but your description of the agriculture sector's decline could be more precise regarding the specific years. Overall, the response is well-structured and addresses the prompt effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used appropriately to group related information. You use some cohesive devices like 'Meanwhile' and 'At the beginning' to guide the reader. However, the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to avoid a slightly mechanical feel. For example, the transition between the manufacturing and agriculture descriptions could be smoother. Referencing is generally clear, and the progression of ideas from the overview to the specific details is logical and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'upward trend', 'significant', 'substantial drop', and 'converged'. These terms are used accurately to describe the data. There are some minor issues with word choice, such as 'number of employments' (employment is usually uncountable in this context) and 'finished off at'. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and avoid repetitive phrasing. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('the' before Manufacturing, 'the' before Healthcare) and minor punctuation issues. For example, 'while, the agriculture sector' contains an unnecessary comma. Despite these errors, the meaning is always clear, and the mistakes do not impede communication. To achieve a higher score, focus on consistent article usage and refining your control over complex sentence structures to ensure they are error-free.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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