Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates the information about jobs in four sectors (Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, Healthcare) in the USA between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the retail and healthcare sector grew considerably while the manufacturing sector showed fluctuations. By contrast, the farming industry experienced a significant decline.

By year 1980, the manufacturing industry produced a huge number of jobs, rose from 15 million employment opportunities to 20 million. Subsequently, it fell to 13 million jobs in 2020.

Farming industry dropped over the time. Initially agriculture shared approximately 6 million jobs in 1960 which reduced to halft by the year 2020.

On the other hand, retail and healthcare went up steadily. In 1960, retail produced 6 million jobs and healthcare generated 3 million and these figures rose significantly. By the year 1980, these two job sectors increased to 5 million and 10 million jobs respectively.

This figure did not stop here and grew to 16 millon jobs in both sectors by the end of the year 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and provides a clear overview. However, there are inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, you state that the manufacturing sector rose from 15 to 20 million by 1980, but the graph shows it peaking earlier and declining by 1980. Additionally, you mention that retail and healthcare reached 16 million each by 2020, while the graph indicates they reached different levels. While the main features are identified, the lack of precision in data interpretation prevents a higher score. Ensure you double-check the axes and data points before writing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'By contrast', 'Subsequently', and 'On the other hand' to link ideas. However, the paragraphing is slightly disjointed, and some transitions feel a bit mechanical. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the connection between the final sentence and the previous paragraph is weak. To improve, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a specific theme and that sentences flow more naturally into one another.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuations', 'significant decline', and 'employment opportunities'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and spelling, such as 'halft' instead of 'half' and 'millon' instead of 'million'. The phrasing 'This figure did not stop here' is slightly informal for an academic report. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and ensure accurate spelling of key terms throughout your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'By year 1980' (missing 'the'), 'agriculture shared approximately 6 million jobs' (incorrect verb choice), and 'reduced to halft' (incorrect form). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. To improve, pay closer attention to article usage, verb tenses, and sentence construction. Aim for more error-free sentences by proofreading your work for basic subject-verb agreement and prepositional accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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