Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

the line graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in four sectors of united states economy ,between 1960 to 2020

overall ,in the manufacturing sector the jobs are available in the noticable amount for example 20 million ,and in the retail sector the amount of jobs places are grows rapidly in the sequence . the most special thing is noticable in the healthcare sectore that the number kog jobs are jumpesd very fastly

in 1960, the manufacturing sectore grows from 15 millions to 20 millions but falls slowly and stuck at the around 16 million in the end of 2020 . thr number of jobs in retail sector grows rapidly in year 1960 from five millions to 16 millions at the end of giving period .

other two catogoreis agriculture and healthcare has noticable ups and downs from 1960 to 2020 in number of jobs for example in health care sectore is noticable change to be seen that it climbs very fastly from almpst 1 to fifteen millionsd nad the agriculture secrore downs in sequence of time

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response identifies the main trends, such as the growth in the healthcare sector and the decline in agriculture. However, the report lacks precision in data reporting. For instance, stating that manufacturing 'grows from 15 millions to 20 millions' is inaccurate based on the graph, and the description of the retail sector is vague. The overview is present but lacks a clear summary of the most significant trends. To improve, ensure that data points are accurately transcribed and that the comparison between sectors is more analytical rather than just listing observations.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, which helps the overall structure. However, the logical flow is hindered by poor sentence construction and a lack of effective cohesive devices. Transitions between ideas are often missing or mechanical, such as the repetitive use of 'in the... sector'. The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of the data. Improving the use of linking words like 'consequently', 'in contrast', or 'meanwhile' would significantly enhance the clarity of the report.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. There are frequent spelling errors, such as 'noticable', 'sectore', 'kog', 'jumpesd', and 'catogoreis'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to describe trends with precision; for example, using 'jumps' or 'climbs' is acceptable, but the lack of variety and the persistent spelling issues prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on learning specific collocations for describing trends, such as 'a significant increase', 'a steady decline', or 'fluctuated', and proofread carefully for spelling accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('jobs are available', 'amount of jobs places are grows'), incorrect verb tenses, and misuse of articles. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in errors, such as 'the most special thing is noticable in the healthcare sectore that the number kog jobs are jumpesd very fastly'. Greater attention to basic sentence structure and proofreading for verb forms is essential.

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