Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The given line graph iluustrates the number of jobs available in four sectors of the US economy- manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare- between 1960 and 2020

Overall, employment in healthcare sectors and retail sector followed an upward trend over the period, whereas agriculture experienced a substantial decline .Manufacturing, meanwhile, remained relatively high despite a gradual decrease towards the end of the period.

In 1960, manufacturing accounted for a large number of jobs, at approximately 15, while both retail and agriculture atood at around 6. By comparision , healthcare had the lowest figure, at only about 3. over the following two decades, manufacturing continued to dominate, rising to approximately 20 in 1980. Retail and healthcare also increased during this peiod, reaching around 10 and 5 respectively.

From 2000 onwards, the pattern became more varied. Manufacturing remained the largest sector, although its figure gradually declined to around 16 by 2020.Agriculture followed the lowest figure at the end of the period, at approximtely 3. In contrast, healthcare experienced consiserable growth, reaching about 15 in 2020. Retail also increased steadily and finished at roughly the same level.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all parts of the task well. You have identified the main trends and provided relevant comparisons, such as the contrast between the growth in healthcare and the decline in agriculture. The overview is clear and effectively summarizes the key developments over the 60-year period. You have selected key features, such as the dominance of manufacturing and the shift in the healthcare sector, which provides a good summary of the data. To reach a higher band, ensure that all data points are clearly referenced, as the units (e.g., millions) were omitted, which is important for full accuracy in reporting.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is smooth, moving from the initial state in 1960 to the final trends in 2020. You use cohesive devices such as 'meanwhile', 'by comparison', and 'in contrast' effectively to link ideas. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the overview from the detailed analysis. While the flow is generally good, ensure that referencing remains consistent throughout to avoid any minor confusion in the sequence of events.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the information clearly. Phrases like 'upward trend', 'substantial decline', and 'gradual decrease' are used accurately. However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'iluustrates', 'atood', 'comparision', 'peiod', and 'consiserable'. These errors are noticeable but do not impede communication. To improve, focus on proofreading your work to eliminate these slips, and try to incorporate a slightly wider variety of synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' to enhance the sophistication of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'Manufacturing, meanwhile, remained relatively high despite a gradual decrease...'. While the majority of your sentences are clear, there are some minor punctuation and grammatical slips, such as missing spaces after commas and occasional missing articles (e.g., 'in healthcare sectors'). These errors are infrequent and do not cause difficulty for the reader. To achieve a higher band, aim for more consistent control over punctuation and ensure that subject-verb agreement is maintained throughout the text.

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