Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph shows the number of people working in four sectors: manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the United States between 1960 and 2020.

overall, jobs in healthcare and retail increased during this period, while manufacturing and agriculture went down. By 2020, healthcare and retail had more workers than manufacturing.

In 1960, manufacturing had the highest number of workers at about 15 million. It increased to 20 million in 1980, but then it started to fall and reached around 13 million by 2020. Agriculture showed a different pattern. It dropped from about 5 million to 3 million by 1980 and stayed almost the same until the end of the period.

now, retail and healthcare grew steadily. Retail increased from 6 million workers in 1960 to 10 million in 1980, and then continued to rise to 16 million in 2020. health had the least number of jobs at only 2 million in 1960, but it increased quickly over the years and reached 16 million in 2020, making it one of the largest fields.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends effectively. You have successfully highlighted the key features, such as the growth in healthcare and retail compared to the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. The overview is clear and provides a good summary of the overall shifts. To reach a higher band, ensure that all data points are accurate; for instance, the graph shows manufacturing peaking around 1980, which you noted, but ensure your comparisons between sectors are more explicit throughout the body paragraphs to better highlight the relative changes over the 60-year period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. Each paragraph focuses on a specific grouping of sectors, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. Cohesive devices such as 'In 1960', 'but then', and 'over the years' are used to link information. However, the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs could be smoother. Additionally, ensure that referencing is consistent; for example, you switch from 'healthcare' to 'health' in the final paragraph, which can slightly disrupt the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'sectors', 'pattern', 'steadily', and 'reached'. The language is generally precise enough to convey the trends accurately. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations or varied synonyms for 'increased' and 'decreased' to avoid repetition. For example, instead of 'increased quickly', you could use 'experienced a rapid surge'. There are minor issues with capitalization, such as 'health' instead of 'healthcare', which should be addressed to ensure a more professional tone.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. Most sentences are clear and easy to follow. However, there are some punctuation and capitalization errors, such as starting sentences with lowercase letters ('overall', 'now', 'health'). While these do not impede communication, they affect the overall accuracy. You have good control over past tense verbs to describe the historical data, which is appropriate for this task. To aim for a higher band, focus on consistent capitalization and proofreading for minor slips in sentence structure.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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