Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the changes in the percentage of employment across four different sectors—Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Health—over a sixty-year period from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, employment in the Retail and Health sectors experienced significant growth throughout the period, with Retail eventually becoming the largest employer. Conversely, the proportions of workers in Manufacturing and Agriculture showed an overall downward trend, despite an initial rise in Manufacturing.

In 1960, Manufacturing was the dominant sector, employing 15% of the workforce. This figure peaked significantly at 20% in 1980 before steadily declining over the next forty years, dropping to around 13% by 2020. Agriculture started as the third largest sector at roughly 6% in 1960, but it experienced a sharp decline to 3% by 1980 and continued to dwindle slightly, ending at just 2% at the close of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have identified the main trends and provided a clear overview, the omission of data regarding the Health sector—which is explicitly mentioned in your introduction—means the task is not fully addressed. To improve, ensure all categories mentioned in the prompt are described with supporting data. The current response is incomplete, as it stops abruptly after discussing Manufacturing and Agriculture, leaving the reader without information on the Retail and Health sectors' specific trajectories beyond the overview.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is logically organized with a clear introduction and an overview paragraph. You use cohesive devices such as 'Conversely' and 'In 1960' to transition between ideas effectively. However, because the essay is incomplete and lacks a concluding section or further body paragraphs to cover the remaining data, the overall progression is interrupted. The paragraphing is appropriate for the length provided, but the lack of development prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure you complete the analysis of all data points to create a cohesive and balanced report.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a good range of vocabulary appropriate for an academic report, using terms such as 'dominant sector', 'proportion', 'dwindle', and 'workforce'. The word choice is generally accurate and helps convey the trends clearly. There are no significant spelling or word-choice errors. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more varied collocations or less common synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' to show greater flexibility. Overall, the vocabulary is sufficient for the task, though the limited length restricts the opportunity to demonstrate a wider range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The grammar is generally accurate, and you have successfully used a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. For example, the sentence 'Agriculture started as the third largest sector at roughly 6% in 1960, but it experienced a sharp decline...' is well-constructed. There are no major grammatical errors that impede communication. To improve, aim to incorporate a wider variety of complex structures, such as passive voice or participle clauses, to enhance the sophistication of your writing. The current level of accuracy is good, but the range of structures is somewhat limited by the brevity of the text.

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