Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 7.5)
The graph shows information about the number of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, manufacturing started the period with the higher number of jobs, retail and healthcare had a significant increase during the years, and finished 2020 above manufacturing. Additionally, agriculture presented a decrease of jobs when comparing 1960 with 2020.
One of the main features in this graph is manufacturing, it started 1960 at 15 million jobs, and peaked at 20 million by 1980, the highest number recorded in the graph. It decreased to around 13 million jobs by the end of the period. Retail and healthcare, in comparison, started the recorded period with around 6 million and 2 million respectively; both rose constantly and finished 2020 above manufacturing with over 15 million jobs for each sector.
Agriculture, on the other hand, the figure shows a decrease in the total numbers. In 1960, over 5 million people were employed by agriculture, this number dropped to around 4 million in 1980, stayed stable until 2000, and had a slight decrease to around 2 million by 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 8.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.0 |
| Overall | 7.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5
You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the data. You covered all four sectors and made relevant comparisons, such as noting that retail and healthcare overtook manufacturing by 2020. The key features, including the peak of manufacturing in 1980 and the decline in agriculture, are well-highlighted. To reach a higher band, ensure that all data points are precise; for instance, ensure the distinction between 'over 15 million' and the exact visual representation is clear. Overall, the response is well-structured and addresses the prompt effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.0
The response is logically organized, with a clear introduction, an overview paragraph, and two body paragraphs focusing on different sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Additionally', 'In comparison', and 'on the other hand' are used effectively to guide the reader through the data. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the trends. The progression of ideas is smooth, and the information is presented in a way that is easy to follow. The use of referencing is generally clear, contributing to a coherent piece of writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 7.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe trends, using terms like 'peaked', 'rose constantly', and 'remained stable'. The language is generally precise and appropriate for an academic report. There are no significant spelling or word-choice errors that impede communication. To improve further, you could incorporate more sophisticated collocations or varied synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' to avoid repetition and add more nuance to your descriptions of the data trends.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures effectively. Most sentences are error-free, and your control of punctuation is generally good. There are minor issues, such as the comma splice in 'manufacturing, it started 1960', which should be a semicolon or a full stop. Additionally, ensure consistent preposition use, such as 'employed in agriculture' rather than 'by agriculture'. Despite these minor slips, the grammatical control is strong, and the meaning is always clear, which is consistent with a high band score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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