Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph compares the number of occupations that are in millions in four categories of the economy from 1960 to 2020

Overall the two sectors followed the downward trend while others are following the increasing trend over these 60-year period. Ass compare to Retail ended at a higher level than Healthcare.

In 1960 Retail started from 6 jobs and throughout these following years it rises sharply from 6 to 16 occupations .In stark contrast , Agriculture was seen to begin from six also but it dramatically decreased over all these year in addition it end up at low point which is approximately 2 or 3.

On the other hand, Healthcare began from 2 and grow sharply as well the stage of Retail Sector. While Manufacturing started 15 jobs in 1960 it increased to 20 in 1980 but this sector significantly fall in the next forty year from 20 to around 13.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends. However, the overview is slightly confusing; stating 'two sectors followed the downward trend' is inaccurate, as Manufacturing shows a rise then a fall, and the comparison between Retail and Healthcare is vague. The data reporting is generally accurate, but the description of the trends could be more precise. For example, stating Agriculture 'end up at low point' lacks professional tone. To reach a higher band, ensure the overview clearly distinguishes between the overall growth and decline patterns and provides more accurate data points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally awkward, such as 'Ass compare to' and 'in addition it end up'. The transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs is functional but lacks sophistication. While the progression of ideas is generally clear, the referencing could be improved to ensure smoother flow between sentences. The paragraphing is appropriate for a report of this nature.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There is some repetition of basic verbs like 'started', 'increased', and 'grow'. Phrases such as 'occupations that are in millions' are clunky. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'Ass compare to' instead of 'In comparison to'. To improve, you should incorporate more precise reporting verbs and nouns related to economic trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'a significant decline'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'the two sectors followed the downward trend' (when the graph shows more complexity), 'it rises sharply' (tense inconsistency), and 'this sector significantly fall' (subject-verb agreement error). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing around commas and periods. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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