Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrates information about the number of employment in four sectors of the economy in the us between Ninety to twenty century.

Initially, at 1960 the employment of healthcare rising continuously and reach five in just twenty year’s after that’s reaches his peak in 2020 which is 16. However the jobs of agriculture starts with 5 in 1960 and get a huge downfall just in twenty years they fall to 3 and dropped to 2 in 2020. Moreover retail makes a good start with 5 and reached 10 in just two decades on 2020 reached his peaked which is 16 same as healthcare. At last manufacturing comes which start fifteen and reach twenty in just twenty years however the luck is not with them and got a downfall after twenty years later they dropped to thirteen. Moreover on twenty twenty they reach 13 which is his lowest i think its his bad luck.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to summarise the graph but fails to provide a clear overview or identify significant trends effectively. While it mentions the four sectors, the data points are often inaccurate or confusingly presented (e.g., stating agriculture 'dropped to 2 in 2020' without clear context). The description is overly focused on individual data points rather than comparing the sectors or highlighting the main features as required by the task. The lack of a clear summary and the inclusion of subjective commentary ('I think its his bad luck') are inappropriate for an academic report. The response addresses the task only partially, as the information is not clearly or accurately conveyed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes misused, such as 'Initially, at 1960' and 'At last manufacturing comes'. The transition between ideas is often abrupt, and the referencing is unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the trends over the specified time period. The structure lacks a cohesive flow, and the paragraphing does not effectively separate the introduction, overview, and body details, which hinders the overall clarity of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'rising', 'reach', and 'downfall'. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'the number of employment' instead of 'employment levels' and 'twenty century' instead of 'the 20th century'. The student struggles to use precise terminology to describe trends, such as 'get a huge downfall' instead of 'experienced a significant decline'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the information with the necessary precision for an academic task.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are significant issues with verb tenses (e.g., 'the employment of healthcare rising' instead of 'rose'), subject-verb agreement, and punctuation. The sentence structures are mostly simple or incorrectly formed, with very few attempts at complex structures. Errors such as 'twenty year’s' (incorrect apostrophe) and 'on 2020' (incorrect preposition) are persistent. The lack of control over basic grammar and the high frequency of errors significantly limit the clarity of the writing.

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