Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph below illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is evident that the number of jobs in healthcare and retail sector increased over time whereas the number of jobs in manufacturing sector experienced downward trend.

In 1960, there were 15 million jobs in manufacturing industry considerably higher than the figure for others. After which it increased gradually reaching 20 million over two decades, it then started to decline and continued to do so until the end of the period, reaching13 million. Retail and agriculture sectors both had the same employment figures approximately 6 million. After which they followed entirely opposite routes, with the figure for retail industry increased steadily reaching 15 million in 2000 where it took over the manufacturing sector and stood at 16 million by 2020. In contrast, the figure for agriculture sector decline gradually reached 3 million by 2000, it then further decreased to 2 million by the end. Moreover, the healthcare sector had the lowest number of jobs in 1960, it then increased significantly reaching to the same level as retail sector at 16 million by 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the data. You covered all four sectors and made relevant comparisons, such as noting when the healthcare sector reached the same level as retail. However, the response could be improved by ensuring the data points are more precise. For instance, you mention the manufacturing sector reached 20 million, but the graph shows it peaking slightly below that. Additionally, the description of the agriculture sector's decline is accurate, but the overall summary could benefit from a more distinct separation between the growth and decline trends to enhance clarity.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized, with a clear introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs that group the data effectively. You use cohesive devices like 'whereas', 'in contrast', and 'moreover' to link ideas. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or grammatically awkward, such as 'After which it increased gradually' and 'After which they followed entirely opposite routes'. These sentence fragments interrupt the flow. Improving the connection between sentences by using relative clauses or more varied linking phrases would help achieve a higher band score for cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'downward trend', 'steadily', and 'significantly'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'sectors of economy' (should be 'sectors of the economy') and 'the figure for agriculture sector decline' (should be 'declined'). While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, the phrasing is occasionally repetitive. To improve, focus on using more precise reporting verbs and noun phrases to describe the trends, ensuring that your word choices are consistently accurate and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. However, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as missing articles ('the manufacturing industry'), comma splices ('...reached 20 million over two decades, it then started...'), and tense inconsistencies. Some sentences are slightly disjointed due to punctuation errors. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of conjunctions to avoid run-on sentences will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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