Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph provides about information the number of jobs in four sectors ( Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare ) of the economy in the US over a 60-year periods, starting from 1960.
Overall, it is evident from the line graph that, there was a significant increased trend in agricultral and retail job sectors, whereas manufacturing and healthcare showed a slightly decreased trend throughout the period. Furthermore, there was a similar number of jobs in agricultral and retail job sector in the final year.
Looking first at the sectors that experienced growth, the number of jobs in agricultral and retail sectors of economy were observed to rise from 6 millions and 3 millions to just over 15 millions respectively over the period.
On the otherhand, in agricultural sector, there was a slightly delined trend accounted for approximately 2 millions in the year from 1960 to 2020. Moreover, the number of jobs in manufacturing sector stood at 15 millions in 1960 and the figure slightly rise to 20 millions in 1980. However, in the final year jobs accounted for approximately 14 millions in manufacturing sector.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarize the main features of the graph, but there are significant inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, you state that manufacturing and healthcare showed a 'slightly decreased trend,' which contradicts the visual data, and your description of the agricultural sector is confusing and factually inconsistent with the graph. While you identify some key features, the misinterpretation of the data prevents a clear overview. To improve, ensure you carefully cross-reference your written statements with the graph's axes and trends before finalizing your summary. The overview is present but lacks accuracy regarding the actual trends shown.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Overall,' 'Furthermore,' and 'On the other hand' to link ideas. However, the logical progression is hindered by the factual inaccuracies mentioned in the task achievement section. Additionally, some transitions feel slightly mechanical. To reach a higher band, focus on ensuring that the logical flow between sentences is supported by accurate data points, and use a wider variety of cohesive devices to connect your comparisons more fluidly.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'sectors,' 'economy,' and 'trend.' However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'agricultral' and 'delined,' and some awkward phrasing like 'provides about information the number.' These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your writing. To improve, try to incorporate more precise reporting verbs and nouns, such as 'fluctuated,' 'remained stable,' or 'witnessed a sharp decline,' and ensure you proofread for spelling accuracy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt to use complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('the number of jobs... were observed') and incorrect preposition usage ('in the year from 1960 to 2020'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing around parentheses. While these errors rarely prevent the reader from understanding the general meaning, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency of the text. Focus on subject-verb agreement and consistent sentence construction.
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