Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 7.0)
The line graph illustrates the number of jobs created in four sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, manufacturing recorded the highest level of employment at the beginning of the period and continued to grow until 1980, after which it declined considerably. By contrast, the number of jobs in the retail and agriculture sectors increased over time, while healthcare experienced an overall downward trend and remained the smallest sector by the end of the period.
To begin with, manufacturing accounted for approximately 15 million jobs in 1960, making it the largest employment sector at that time. This figure rose by around 5 million to reach a peak of roughly 20 million in 1980. However, employment in manufacturing subsequently fell significantly, ending the period at approximately 13 million jobs in 2020.
In contrast, employment in both the retail and agriculture sectors increased considerably. Retail started at around 6 million jobs, while agriculture stood at approximately 3 million. Both sectors then experienced substantial growth, with employment reaching around 15 million by 2020. Meanwhile, healthcare followed the opposite pattern. It began at roughly 6 million jobs before declining steadily to about 2 million by the end of the period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
You have provided a clear overview of the main trends and successfully selected key data points to support your description. You accurately identified the peak in manufacturing and the contrasting trends in the other sectors. However, there is a significant factual error in your analysis: you state that healthcare 'declined steadily' and remained the smallest sector, whereas the graph shows healthcare actually experienced a significant upward trend, becoming the largest sector by 2020. This misinterpretation of the data negatively impacts the accuracy of your report. To improve, ensure you carefully cross-reference the legend and the axes before writing to avoid misreading the trends.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The response is well-organized with a clear logical progression. You use paragraphing effectively to separate the overview from the detailed body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'By contrast', 'To begin with', and 'Meanwhile' are used appropriately to guide the reader through the comparisons. The information is presented in a coherent manner, and the relationship between the different sectors is easy to follow. The structure is logical and supports the overall flow of the report well.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your ideas with precision. Phrases such as 'recorded the highest level of employment', 'substantial growth', and 'downward trend' are used effectively. There is a good attempt to use varied terminology to describe trends, which helps maintain the reader's interest. While the vocabulary is generally accurate and appropriate for an academic task, incorporating a few more sophisticated collocations or topic-specific terms could elevate the response further. Overall, the lexical range is adequate and supports clear communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5
Your writing displays a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. The grammar is generally accurate, and your control over punctuation is consistent. You successfully use complex structures, such as 'manufacturing accounted for... making it the largest...', which demonstrates a good command of sentence variety. There are very few errors, and those that exist do not impede communication. The writing is fluent and easy to read, showing a high level of grammatical control throughout the response.
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