Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line chart illustrates regarding the count of jobs in four different domains which is directly correlated to the economy in the US from 1960 and 2020. Additionally, the fields included manufacturing, retail, agriculture and health care.

Overall, the chart features four domains of the economy but the two are the most significant legends. The first one is Manufacturing and the other one is Healthcare as it shows the clear steadiness to rapid downfall over the years.

In 1960, the Manufacturing division were on the peak around 15 Million job opportunities were available and after two decade it jumped from 15 million to 20 million. Furthermore, In 2020 it portrays a sudden change and the jobs count goes down to around 13 Million respectively. On the other hand, Retails sector on at the downfall in 1960 the count of employment were around 6 Million. Moreover, in 2020 it climbed to almost 16 million which is a rapid change.

Healthcare is the most notable sector for employment. At first it was above the 2 million but over the decades in 2020 it jumped and reached to the 15.5 million. Agriculture accounted as the least impotant profession in the US between 1960 and 2000 there were no major change.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response provides a general overview and covers the four sectors mentioned in the graph. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial and contains inaccuracies. For instance, you describe manufacturing as having a 'rapid downfall' after 1980, but the data shows it remained relatively stable until 2000 before declining. Additionally, the description of the retail sector as being 'at the downfall' in 1960 is confusing, as it was simply at a lower starting point. While you identify the main trends, the lack of precision in interpreting the data points and the failure to make meaningful comparisons between the sectors limits the score. To improve, ensure you accurately reflect the data trends and use specific figures to support your observations.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'Additionally, the fields included...' and 'Furthermore, In 2020 it portrays...'. The progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where the description of the sectors lacks a clear logical flow. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs could be smoother. To achieve a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic descriptors like 'count of jobs' and 'sudden change'. There are also some awkward word choices, such as 'most significant legends' (likely meaning 'sectors') and 'least impotant profession' (spelling error). While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of sophisticated or topic-specific vocabulary (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stagnant', 'upward trajectory') prevents a higher score. Focus on learning collocations related to data description to improve your precision and range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('the Manufacturing division were', 'Retails sector on at the downfall') and awkward phrasing ('the jobs count goes down'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are issues with capitalization and article usage. While the errors do not completely obscure the meaning, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic agreement and tense consistency to improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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