Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The provided line graph illustrates how many vacancies were opened in four different economical sectors from the year 1960 to 2020 in the United States.
Overall, the retail and healthcare industries experienced an upward trend while the manufacturing and healthcare industries faced a downward trend.
In 1960, approximately 5 million jobs were opened in the retail industry. The figure saw a considerable rise until 2000 when it reached 15 million and remained steady till the end of the period. In the beginning of the period, there were approximately 2.5 million jobs in the healthcare industry. It increased moderately until 1990 when it faced a dramatic rise and continued to grow until the end of the period reaching 15 million jobs.
The number of vacancies in the manufacturing industry saw a significant increase until 1990 when it peaked at 20 million jobs but thereafter, it started declining till the end and hit a low-point of nearly 13 million. The agriculture industry experienced a steady drop until the end falling from 5 million to nearly half of it.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response provides a clear overview and covers all four sectors mentioned in the graph. You successfully identified the main trends, such as the growth in retail and healthcare and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, there is a significant factual error in the overview: you stated that the 'healthcare industry faced a downward trend,' when the graph clearly shows it increasing throughout the period. This contradiction between your summary and the data points impacts the accuracy of your task achievement. To improve, ensure your overview accurately reflects the data presented in the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and two body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used appropriately to group the sectors by their trends. Cohesive devices such as 'In 1960,' 'thereafter,' and 'at the beginning of the period' are used to guide the reader through the timeline. However, the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs could be smoother. The logical progression is generally clear, though the internal consistency of the overview needs attention to ensure the reader is not confused by the conflicting information regarding the healthcare sector.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'upward trend,' 'considerable rise,' 'moderately,' and 'dramatic rise.' There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary, which is generally successful. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as using 'economical sectors' instead of 'economic sectors' and 'vacancies were opened' when referring to the total number of jobs. Despite these minor slips, the vocabulary is adequate to convey the intended meaning clearly throughout the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. Most sentences are error-free, and the grammar does not impede communication. You show good control over tense usage, particularly when describing past trends. There are a few minor errors, such as 'remained steady till the end of the period' (where 'until' would be more formal) and 'nearly half of it' (which is slightly vague). Overall, the grammatical control is solid, with a variety of structures used effectively to describe the data points and trends over time.
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