Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The given line chart shows details about the number of jobs in different sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the jobs of healthcare had significant increased from 1980 to 2020. In 1980 job of manufacturing had grown but after 1980 it had steadily decreased.The jibs of agriculture had slowly decreased from 1960 to 2020.
In 1960 , 15 million individuals had done work in manufacturing, while in 1980, they reached at 20 million. The healthcare sector started at around 2 million jobs and had reached at 5 million in 1980. The retail and agriculture department had begun at almost the same amount but the agriculture sector faced decrease in the job market while the retail had been increased to 10 million jobs in 1980.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have identified some main features, such as the trends in manufacturing and healthcare, the analysis is incomplete. You have not covered the entire period up to 2020 for all sectors, and the data points provided are somewhat selective rather than comprehensive. To improve, ensure you provide a more thorough overview of the trends across the entire timeframe and include more specific data points to support your descriptions. The failure to reach the word count means the task is not fully addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay has a basic structure with an introduction and body paragraphs, but the logical progression is hindered by the brevity of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall' and 'while', but they are somewhat repetitive and mechanical. The paragraphing is present but the ideas within the paragraphs are not fully developed, leading to a disjointed feel. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words to show relationships between the data points and ensure each paragraph has a clear focus that flows logically into the next.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is limited and somewhat repetitive. Phrases like 'had significant increased' and 'faced decrease' show a lack of precision and grammatical control in word choice. You rely on basic verbs such as 'done work' and 'reached', which do not demonstrate the flexibility required for higher bands. To improve, try to incorporate more varied vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a sharp decline', and ensure you use the correct word forms (e.g., 'significant increase' instead of 'significant increased').
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly with verb tenses and word forms. For example, 'jobs of healthcare had significant increased' should be 'healthcare jobs saw a significant increase', and 'jibs of agriculture' contains a spelling error. The use of the past perfect tense ('had grown', 'had reached') is often unnecessary and inaccurate for describing historical data trends. The sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited attempts at complex sentences. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage will help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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