Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph shows information about the number of occupations in four different sectors of the economy in the US between the year 1960 and 2020.

Overall, in the first 20 years the number of jobs were increased in 3 sectors and in only agriculture it was declined. Retail and healthcare were the only sectors in which the occupation never declined.

The manufacturing, retail and healthcare went up by 5 millions, 4 millions, and 2.5 millions from 1960 to 1980 respectively. Agriculture sector had to face 3.5 millions of job. Afterwards, manufacturing continuously decreasing and retail decreased whereas retail and healthcare were the only sector to never decline with the agriculture being constant till 2000 and again de we fail in 2020.

In the starting of 1960, the highest number of jobs were in manufacturing and the healthcare being the least while both retail and agricultural were equal. At the end of 2020, again retail and agricultural remains equal but this time as the highest in the number

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to summarize the main features of the graph, but the information provided is often inaccurate or confusing. For example, the claim that retail and agriculture were equal at the end of 2020 is not supported by standard interpretations of such data, and the description of trends is frequently contradictory (e.g., stating sectors 'never declined' while simultaneously describing decreases). The overview is vague and fails to highlight the most significant trends clearly. To improve, you must ensure that your data points are accurate and that your descriptions of trends (increasing, decreasing, fluctuating) are consistent with the visual evidence provided in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression of ideas is hindered by confusing sentence structures and unclear referencing. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall' and 'In the starting of', they are sometimes used mechanically or incorrectly. The transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is abrupt, and the lack of clarity in the body makes it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison of the four sectors over time. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear focus would significantly enhance the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'went up', 'decreased', and 'number of jobs'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'de we fail' (which is unclear) and 'the occupation never declined' (where 'employment' or 'job numbers' would be more appropriate). To reach a higher band, you should incorporate a wider range of precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'peaked', or 'experienced a downward trend', and ensure that your word choices are contextually accurate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('the number of jobs were increased'), incorrect preposition usage ('In the starting of 1960'), and awkward phrasing ('the healthcare being the least'). The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in errors, such as the run-on sentence in the third paragraph. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage for describing past data, and refining your sentence structure to ensure clarity and accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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