Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs that were available in four different sectors of the economy in the US, from 1960 - 2020.

By having a look at the chart, it is clear that in 1960, 15 millions of jobs were provided by manufacturing sectors and it continued to rosee up to 20 million, before it declined to roughly 16 million in 2000, whereas, retail sector ranked second in terms of jobs, the number of jobs in this sector accounted at slightly more than 5 million in 1960. After that, a gradual increase was recorded and it reached 15 million in 2000, then it remained relatively stable across the period.

Further more, health care sector starts at roughly 2.5 million jobs in 1960 and the job number become almost doubled in 1980. Suprisingly in 2020 the number of jobs in health care sector peaked around slightly more than 15 million exact same as retail sector. However, the agriculture sector ranked last among four in terms of jobs. Interestingly, it start from same number of jobs as retail sectors, but after 1960 the number of jobs declined to approximately 2.5 million in 1980 and then became relatively stable throughout the period.

overall, it can be evident that the manufacturing sectors provide highest numbers of job throughout the period except in 2020 while, agriculture sector ranked fourth in the number of job

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends over the period. However, the analysis is slightly hampered by inaccuracies in data interpretation. For instance, you state the manufacturing sector reached 20 million, whereas the graph shows it peaking closer to 18 million. Additionally, you mention the agriculture sector started at the same number as the retail sector in 1960, but the graph indicates they were distinct. While you provide a clear overview, the lack of precision in reporting the data points prevents a higher band score. To improve, ensure you carefully cross-reference the axes with the data lines to avoid misrepresenting the information.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs for the sectors, and a concluding summary. You use some cohesive devices such as 'whereas', 'after that', and 'furthermore' to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel slightly forced. The referencing is generally clear, but the structure could be improved by grouping the sectors more effectively (e.g., those that increased versus those that declined) to create a more sophisticated progression of ideas. Paragraphing is used appropriately, which helps the reader follow the development of the report.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'illustrates', 'declined', 'remained relatively stable', and 'peaked'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as '15 millions of jobs' (should be '15 million jobs') and 'the job number become almost doubled' (should be 'the number of jobs almost doubled'). While these errors do not impede communication, they indicate a need for more precise control over numerical expressions and verb tenses. Expanding your range to include more varied synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' would also enhance the quality of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'health care sector starts' (should be 'started') and 'provide highest numbers' (should be 'provided the highest number'). Tense consistency is also an issue, as you switch between present and past tenses when describing historical data. While these errors are noticeable, they rarely impede the reader's understanding of the main points. To reach a higher band, focus on maintaining a consistent past tense for historical data and refining your use of articles and pluralization.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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