Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The multi-line graphs depict the information for the various job categories such as Manufacturing, retail, Agriculture and Healthcare took part of the US economy from 1960 to 2020. The data are given in millions.

Overall, it can be seen that the highest number of jobs was in the manufacturing sector. Hence the lowest share of jobs was in the agriculture category.

To begin with, in 1960 the manufacturing sector hold the jobs in the US economy approximately at 15 million. There was sharply increase around 20 million after two decades. It was the maximum number of jobs recorded under the manufacturing sector in the US economy. After that, the jobs under the manufacturing category decreased rapidly in the year 2020. Moreover, only 3 million of jobs accounted for the healthcare sector in 1960. The figure slightly rose during the year 1980. Then after, it gradually went up above 15 million in 2020.

Moving to rest details, in 1960 the retail and agriculture categories accounted by the jobs under the US economy at 6 million. It was almost the same share of the jobs sector in the US. However, the retail category jobs increased suddenly almost 15 million during the year 2000. while in 1980 the agriculture sector jobs slightly decreased below 5 million. Afterwards, it was remain same during the year 2000 and then mildly went down at 2 million in 2000. It was the minimum share of job recorded under the agriculture category in the US economy. However, the retail sector slowly rose above 15 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response provides a clear overview of the main trends and identifies key features, such as the peak in manufacturing and the growth in healthcare. However, the reporting of data is occasionally inaccurate or confusing, such as the claim that agriculture remained the same in 2000 and then went down in 2000. The description of the manufacturing sector's peak is also slightly imprecise. While the main features are covered, the lack of precision in data reporting and some minor inconsistencies in the summary prevent this from reaching a higher band. The response successfully highlights the contrasting trends between the sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs covering the specific sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'Moving to rest details' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Then after' and 'Afterwards, it was remain same'. Referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences is occasionally interrupted by grammatical errors, which makes the progression feel slightly disjointed in places. Overall, the structure is coherent, but the use of cohesive devices could be more natural.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with terms like 'categories', 'sector', 'accounted for', and 'gradually went up'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'took part of the US economy', 'hold the jobs', and 'accounted by the jobs'. These errors do not impede communication, but they demonstrate a limited control over more sophisticated lexical items. To improve, the student should focus on using collocations more accurately and avoiding repetitive phrasing when describing trends.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('manufacturing sector hold', 'it was remain same') and incorrect preposition usage ('accounted by the jobs'). Tense usage is also inconsistent at times. While the meaning remains clear throughout, the frequency of these errors is noticeable and prevents the writing from being considered error-free. The student needs to focus on basic grammatical accuracy, particularly with verb forms and sentence construction, to improve their score.

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