Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This is the graph which illustrate the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. As we can see in line chart it shows the greatest number of jobs in 1960 is of Manufacturing it is leading with 15 million jobs. In Retail and Agriculture they leading with same number of jobs approximately 6 million or above and the least job economy is in health sector which is around 2 millions according to the economy in 1960. However the job economy of Manufacturing is increased by 20 million in 1980 but as the time passed its decreased by 17 million in 2000 and by the time 2020 comes it goes down to 13 million. In Retails and Healthcare job economy it increased by the 2020 around 16 million. But in agriculture it didn't seem to be get hike it decreased from 6 million jobs to 3 million jobs by the year 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the four sectors and their trends over the period. However, the overview is missing; a summary should highlight the most significant trends, such as the overall growth in the service sectors versus the decline in agriculture. The data reporting is sometimes inaccurate, such as the claim that manufacturing increased by 20 million in 1980, which is not supported by the visual data. The response lacks a clear, cohesive summary of the overall trends, focusing instead on individual data points, which limits the development of the response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is presented as a single paragraph, which makes it difficult to follow. There is a lack of logical paragraphing to separate the introduction, overview, and body details. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'However' and 'But', they are often used incorrectly or in a repetitive manner. The progression of ideas is somewhat mechanical, and the lack of clear transitions between the different sectors makes the information feel disjointed. To improve, you should organize your report into distinct paragraphs for the introduction, overview, and specific comparisons.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'job economy' are used repeatedly and are not standard collocations in this context. There are also issues with word choice, such as 'get hike', which is informal and inaccurate. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the data with precision. To reach a higher band, you should use a wider variety of verbs to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', 'surged', or 'remained stable', and use more precise nouns like 'employment figures' or 'workforce numbers' instead of repeating 'jobs'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'This is the graph which illustrate' (subject-verb agreement), 'In Retail and Agriculture they leading' (missing auxiliary verb), and 'by the time 2020 comes it goes down' (tense inconsistency). The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at complex sentences are often faulty. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the lack of commas to separate clauses. Focusing on basic sentence construction and ensuring subject-verb agreement will help improve your score in this area.

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