Band 8.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 8.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 8.5)

The line graph illustrates changes in the number of jobs, measured in millions, in four sectors of the US economy—manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare—between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, manufacturing was the largest source of employment for most of the period, although its figure declined considerably after reaching a peak in 1980. In contrast, employment in healthcare and retail increased substantially, while agriculture experienced a gradual decline. By 2020, retail and healthcare had become the two largest employers.

In 1960, manufacturing employed approximately 15 million people, considerably more than any other sector. This figure then rose to a peak of 20 million in 1980, before falling to around 17 million in 2000 and 13 million in 2020. Thus, despite remaining a major employer, manufacturing lost roughly 7 million jobs from its peak.

Retail, meanwhile, followed a consistently upward trend. Starting at about 6 million jobs in 1960, employment increased to 10 million in 1980 and then climbed sharply to 15 million in 2000. By 2020, the figure had reached approximately 16 million, making retail one of the largest employment sectors.

Healthcare showed the most dramatic growth. From only 2 million jobs in 1960, employment rose to 5 million in 1980, before more than doubling to 11 million in 2000. It subsequently reached 16 million in 2020. Agriculture, by comparison, declined from around 6 million jobs in 1960 to just 2 million in 2020, remaining the smallest sector at the end of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response8.5
Coherence and Cohesion8.5
Lexical Resource7.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy8.5
Overall8.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.5

The response is excellent. You have clearly identified the main trends and provided a logical overview that captures the significant shifts in the US economy between 1960 and 2020. You successfully selected key data points to support your descriptions, such as the peak of manufacturing in 1980 and the dramatic growth of the healthcare sector. The comparison between sectors is well-integrated, and you have fully addressed all parts of the prompt. The information is accurate and effectively highlights the changing landscape of the four sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a distinct focus, moving from an overview to specific sectoral details. You have used a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'In contrast', 'meanwhile', 'subsequently', and 'by comparison', which help the reader follow the narrative of the data. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different sectors, and the referencing is clear throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.5

You demonstrate a wide and precise range of vocabulary. Phrases like 'largest source of employment', 'consistently upward trend', and 'dramatic growth' are used accurately and naturally. You avoid repetition by using synonyms and varied phrasing to describe the trends. The vocabulary is sophisticated and perfectly suited to an academic report, showing a high level of control over collocation and word choice.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.5

The grammar is highly accurate, with a wide range of complex structures used throughout the response. You effectively use participial phrases ('Starting at about 6 million jobs...') and varied sentence structures to maintain flow. Punctuation is used correctly to manage complex information. There are no noticeable errors, and the control over tense and subject-verb agreement is consistent, reflecting a high level of grammatical competence.

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