Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph provides information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the United Stated between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the most noticeable feature is that manufacturing sector is the maximum number of jobs in millions. Retail and healthcare were the grew gradually from begin. Agriculture sector had slighted fell.
Manufacturing sector had the higher number of jobs in 1960 at 15millions. Therefore in 1980 manufacture sector was rose by 20millions of job in 1980 whereas this is the higher than all sector of the years. Retail and agriculture sector had increased from 1980 at 5milllion and 10 million jobs respectively. However at 2020 both the sectors were equal amount of job member did at above 15 millions.
In addition healthcare was declined from 1980 then remained stable till 2000 below 5 million jobs. Moreover healthcare sector represented was slighted down by 2020 at 2 million jobs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarize the main features of the graph, but the information provided is often inaccurate or contradictory to the visual data. For example, the claim that the manufacturing sector had 15 million jobs in 1960 and rose to 20 million by 1980 is not supported by the graph, which shows a different trend. Furthermore, the description of the healthcare and retail sectors is confusing and lacks precision. The overview is weak, as it fails to clearly identify the key trends or significant changes over the period. To improve, ensure that data points are read accurately and that the summary highlights the most important shifts rather than listing potentially incorrect figures.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the logical progression of ideas is frequently disrupted by unclear referencing and awkward transitions. For instance, the use of 'Therefore' and 'However' is often misused, as these connectors do not logically link the preceding and following sentences. The referencing is also problematic, making it difficult to track which sector is being discussed at times. While there is an attempt to use cohesive devices, they are often mechanical or inaccurate, which hinders the overall flow of the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic terms. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'slighted fell' instead of 'slight fall' and 'equal amount of job member' which is non-standard. The use of 'maximum number of jobs' is also imprecise in this context. To reach a higher band, you should focus on using more precise terminology for describing trends, such as 'fluctuated,' 'remained constant,' or 'experienced a downward trend,' and ensure that words are used in their correct grammatical form.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with verb tense and subject-verb agreement, such as 'manufacturing sector is the maximum' and 'healthcare was declined.' Sentence structures are generally simple, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in errors, such as 'whereas this is the higher than all sector of the years.' Punctuation is also inconsistent. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and ensuring that verb tenses are used consistently when describing past data.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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