Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph reveals the statistics of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between the years [redacted phone].It can be seen clearly that there is a close competition among the given jobs, whereas the trends reflect an evident fluctuation across the timeline.

The statistics now need to be illustrated individually. First, we will take manufacturing into account as the one dominating the line graph with 20 million of jobs in the year 1980. It can be seen that the line graph declines gradually.

Whereas, the opposite is seen in both retail and agricultural. The facts demonstrate that both jobs hit 16 million in the year 2020. Lastly, healthcare remains on the lowest position as the line graph falls.

To recapitulate, therefore, it is safe to assert that the line graph presents a wide range of facts illustrating jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US. Considering the facts, the fluctuation depicts a significant activity in the said jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to summarize the graph but fails to provide a clear overview of the main trends. The description of the data is inaccurate and incomplete; for instance, stating that manufacturing dominated with 20 million jobs in 1980 is not supported by a clear analysis of the overall period (1960-2020). Furthermore, the claim that healthcare remains in the lowest position while the graph 'falls' is confusing and lacks precision. The response misses key data points and fails to make meaningful comparisons between the sectors, resulting in a superficial treatment of the information provided.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs is mechanical, using phrases like 'The statistics now need to be illustrated individually' which are unnecessary and unnatural. While some cohesive devices are present, such as 'Whereas' and 'Lastly', they are used to connect poorly developed ideas. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the overall structure does not effectively guide the reader through the data trends.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'the line graph' are used excessively, and the word choice is often imprecise, such as 'close competition among the given jobs' or 'significant activity in the said jobs', which do not accurately describe economic data. There is little evidence of less common lexical items or an awareness of academic style. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey basic meaning but lacks the precision required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but accuracy is inconsistent. There are errors in article usage (e.g., 'the lowest position') and awkward phrasing that impacts readability. While the errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to suggest a lack of control over more complex grammatical forms. Punctuation is generally acceptable, but the overall grammatical control is limited to basic patterns.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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