Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The given line graph depicts the information about number of occupations in millions in four different sectors of the economy in the United States over a sixty year period.

Overall, it is evident some sectors remained relatively stable, while others had a notable shift. Manufacturing accounted for majority of individuals initially, retail and healthcare offered more jobs after a twenty year period and agriculture faced a gradual decline.

Primarily, manufacturing had the largest number of workers in 1960 and reached its peak in 1980 with 20 million jobs followed by a sharp decline to 13 million in 2020.

Retail and healthcare followed an upward trend after 1960 with 10 and 5 million jobs in 1980 respectively. The employments surged in 2000 with both matching at nearly 16 million jobs in 2020 surpassing manufacturing as the largest sector.

On the other hand, agriculture had several fluctuations but offered equal oppurtunities as retail in 1960 to 3 million jobs in 1980 which remained relatively stable till 2000 and eventually plummeted to approximately 1.5 million employments at the end of the era.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends such as the peak of manufacturing and the growth of retail and healthcare. The overview is clear and highlights the main shifts in the economy. However, the data reporting is occasionally imprecise; for instance, stating that retail and healthcare 'matched at nearly 16 million' in 2020 is a good observation, but the description of agriculture's starting point is slightly confusing. The response effectively selects and reports the main features as required by the task, providing a clear summary of the provided graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs that group information by sector. Cohesive devices such as 'Primarily', 'On the other hand', and 'eventually' are used to guide the reader through the data. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different trends. While the flow is generally smooth, some transitions between sentences could be more sophisticated to improve the overall cohesion. The referencing is clear, and the progression of ideas from 1960 to 2020 is easy to follow throughout the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, using terms like 'fluctuations', 'plummeted', and 'surged' to describe the data trends. There are some minor issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'offered equal oppurtunities' (which is slightly imprecise in this context) and 'at the end of the era' (which sounds a bit dramatic for a 60-year period). Spelling is generally accurate, with the exception of 'oppurtunities'. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning clearly, though it lacks the more sophisticated, precise collocations required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical slips, such as 'accounted for majority of individuals' (missing an article) and 'The employments surged' (using 'employments' as a countable noun is non-standard here). Punctuation is generally handled well, and these errors do not impede communication. To reach a higher band, the student should aim for more error-free complex sentences and ensure articles and pluralization are used more consistently. Overall, the control of grammar is sufficient to maintain clarity throughout the report.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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