Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph below illustrates the number of job opportunities that were present between the years 1960 and 2020 in the United States. The economical sector in which the number of jobs were divided were, manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare.

It can be noticed, from 1960 till around 2003, manufacturing sector had the maximum number of job opportunities, ranging from 15 million in 1960 to 20 million in 1980. Sectors such as healthcare and retail, the number of jobs were 6 million and approximately 3 million, in 1960 respectively. For these sectors, there was an exponential growth down the years, where in 2020 the number of jobs were approximate to 16 million for both the sectors.

Certainly there was a downfall for other sectors, agriculture and manufacturing. Agriculture started with 6 million job opportunities in 1960 which than further came down to approximately 2 million in 2020. Manufacturing on the other hand, started with maximum numbers of jobs after the sudden rise in 1980 eventually came to 13 million in 2020.

In summary, these sectors defined the major source of economy in the US .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends such as the growth in healthcare and retail and the decline in agriculture. However, the overview is weak; it lacks a clear summary of the most significant trends, such as the overall shift from manufacturing to service-based sectors. Some data points are slightly inaccurate or confusingly presented, such as the claim that manufacturing reached 13 million in 2020 after a 'sudden rise' in 1980, which misinterprets the graph's trajectory. To reach a higher band, ensure the overview highlights the most striking differences and trends rather than just listing data points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. There is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices like 'on the other hand' and 'in summary'. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions between sentences are abrupt. For instance, the transition from the second to the third paragraph could be smoother to better contrast the growth sectors with the declining ones. Referencing is generally clear, but the overall progression of ideas could be more sophisticated to achieve a higher score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to describe trends using terms like 'exponential growth', 'downfall', and 'job opportunities'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'economical sector' (should be 'economic sector') and 'down the years' (which is informal). The range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic descriptive language. To improve, the student should incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'remained stagnant'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('the number of jobs were divided', 'manufacturing sector had the maximum number'). There are also punctuation errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'than further came down' (should be 'then further decreased'). While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and refining sentence construction would be beneficial.

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