Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors, namely Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare of the US economy, over the period of sixty years from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, employment in manufacturing and agriculture declined over the period, whereas retail and, most strikingly, healthcare grew substantially. As a result, the sector that dominated in 1960 overtaken by the end.

In 1960, manufacturing was by far the largest employer, with around 15 million jobs, and it continued to rise to a peak of roughly 20 million by 1980. After that, however, it fell steadily, dropping to about 13 million by 2020. Agriculture, meanwhile, was already small at 6 million in 1960 and shrank further to just 2 million, remaining the smallest sector throughout.

The rising sectors told the opposite story. Retail climbed steadily from 6 million to around 16 million, while healthcare showed the most dramatic growth of all, soaring from just 2 million in 1960 to roughly 16 million by 2020. By the end of the period, retail and healthcare had become the joint-largest employers, each overtaking a much-reduced manufacturing sector.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response effectively covers all requirements of the task. You have identified the main trends, including the decline of manufacturing and agriculture and the growth of retail and healthcare. The overview is clear and highlights the significant shift in the economy. You have also made relevant comparisons, such as noting that retail and healthcare became the joint-largest employers by 2020. The data is accurately reported, and the key features are well-selected. To reach a band 9, ensure that the overview is slightly more comprehensive by explicitly mentioning the starting and ending points of the trends, but overall, this is a very strong performance that fully addresses the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a distinct focus: the introduction/overview, the declining sectors, and the growing sectors. You have used cohesive devices effectively, such as 'meanwhile,' 'however,' and 'as a result,' which help the reader follow the argument without difficulty. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the referencing is clear throughout. The flow between sentences is smooth, and the information is presented in a way that is easy to follow. No significant issues were noted in this area.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

You have used a good range of vocabulary appropriate for an academic report, such as 'substantially,' 'soaring,' 'dramatically,' and 'joint-largest.' The word choices are precise and help convey the trends accurately. There is a good awareness of collocation, and the language is natural throughout. You avoid repetition by using varied verbs to describe the trends. To improve further, you could incorporate even more sophisticated or less common lexical items to describe the data, but the current range is sufficient for a high band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

The response demonstrates a good variety of complex structures, such as the use of 'whereas' and 'as a result' to connect clauses. The majority of sentences are error-free, and your control over tense and punctuation is strong. There is a minor grammatical slip in the overview: 'the sector that dominated in 1960 overtaken by the end' is missing a verb (should be 'was overtaken'). However, this is a minor error that does not impede communication. The overall control of grammar is excellent, and the range of structures used is appropriate for this task.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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