Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph provides data regarding four occupations in the United States over sixty years.

Overall, numbers of jobs in health occupation and retail jobs have increased significantly whereas manufacturing jobs have declined. Agriculture jobs have been stayed remained over the given period.

The number of jobs in health care and retail professions increased between 1960 and 2020. The health care jobs have climbed up from 5 million in 1980 to 15 million in 2020. Likewise, Retail jobs reached a peak of 15 million in 2000 from 6 million in 1960 and remained stable afterwards.

However, a drastic decline can be observed in manufacturing jobs from 20 million in 1980 to around 13 million in 2020. Similarly, agricultural jobs went down gradually from around 6 million in 1960 to 2 million in 1980 and then remained stable by 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response provides a clear overview of the main trends, identifying the growth in health and retail sectors and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the development of the response. While the main features are selected, the lack of sufficient length means the analysis is somewhat truncated. To improve, ensure you provide a more detailed breakdown of the data points and perhaps include a more comprehensive comparison between the sectors to ensure the task is fully addressed and the length requirement is comfortably met.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs focusing on the increasing and decreasing trends respectively. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Likewise', 'However', and 'Similarly' are used to link ideas effectively. The paragraphing is appropriate for the task. To reach a higher band, ensure that the progression of ideas within paragraphs is more fluid and that the referencing of data points is consistently clear throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with terms like 'significantly', 'drastic decline', and 'remained stable' used correctly. However, there are some minor issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'Agriculture jobs have been stayed remained', which is grammatically awkward and redundant. To improve, aim to use a wider variety of synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' and ensure that collocations are natural. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning, but lacks the sophistication required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some noticeable grammatical errors, such as 'Agriculture jobs have been stayed remained', which contains a double verb error. Additionally, 'The health care jobs have climbed up' is slightly informal. While these errors do not impede communication, they demonstrate a lack of full control over complex structures. To improve, focus on eliminating redundant verbs and ensuring consistent tense usage when describing historical data. Increasing the variety of complex sentence structures will also help improve the overall grammatical range.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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