Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates job trends in four different sectors of the economy: manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, healthcare department experienced a significant growth in jobs from 1980 till the end of period, whereas number of jobs in agriculture sector decrease gradually throughout. Number of jobs in retail and healthcare department continue to grow till it became equal in 2020.
In 1960, manufacturing division recorded 15 million jobs which raised steadily to 20 million in 1980 before it dropped significantly to 13 million by the end of the period. Number of jobs in retail sector increased steadily from 6 million to 15 million and then increased gradually till 2020.
Number of job openings in agriculture department decreased steadily till 1980 to 3 million after which become constant. Number of jobs in healthcare increased steadily from 3 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate; for instance, the claim that retail and healthcare jobs became 'equal' in 2020 is not supported by the data, which shows them at different levels. Additionally, the description of the agriculture sector as 'constant' after 1980 is a slight oversimplification of the minor fluctuations shown. While the key features are highlighted, the lack of precision in reporting the data points prevents a higher score. The response would benefit from more careful verification of the figures provided in the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is generally clear, moving from a general summary to specific details. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive, with many sentences starting with 'Number of jobs in...'. There is a lack of variety in linking words, which makes the flow feel a bit stilted. Improving the use of transition signals and varying sentence structures would enhance the overall coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to describe trends such as 'increased steadily' and 'dropped significantly'. However, the range is limited and somewhat repetitive. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as referring to the sectors as 'departments' or 'divisions', which is not the most precise terminology for economic sectors. To reach a higher band, the student should incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary related to data description and economic trends, while avoiding the repetitive phrasing observed throughout the text.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, particularly with articles (e.g., 'in agriculture sector', 'in retail and healthcare department') and verb tense consistency. Some sentences are missing necessary articles or contain awkward phrasing, such as 'after which become constant'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on article usage and ensuring subject-verb agreement would significantly improve the grammatical quality.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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