Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph represents the frequency of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare sectors of USA, between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, job opportunities has increased in retail and health care sector during given period. whereas downtrend is reported in manufacturing and agriculture sectors.

firstly, number of job positions in manufacturing department has increased to 20 million in 1980, After that it followed downtrend and reduced to 13 millions approximately. Whereas job positions in retail sector reach its peak of 15 million in 2000 after that it remain steady.

on the other hand, it is reported that healthcare sector upsurges after 1980 till 2020 and reaches to nearly 16 million. Moreover, job positions kept receding in agriculture sector, there is sharp downfall between 1960 to 1980, after that it constantly declining till 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. While you have identified the main trends for the four sectors, the analysis is somewhat superficial. You have included some data points, but the comparison between sectors is limited. To improve, ensure you provide a more detailed overview and include more specific data points to support your descriptions. Because the response is under-length, the development of ideas is restricted, preventing a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive feature. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate, such as the use of 'firstly' without a corresponding 'secondly'. The transition between ideas is sometimes abrupt, and the logical flow could be improved by using a wider range of linking words to connect the trends more fluidly. The paragraphing is present but could be more effectively used to separate the distinct trends of the four sectors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. You rely on basic terms like 'increased', 'downtrend', and 'downfall'. There are also some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'frequency of jobs' (should be 'number of jobs') and 'department' (should be 'sector'). To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', or 'gradual decline', and ensure accurate usage of terminology.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('job opportunities has increased'), missing articles ('in retail and health care sector'), and punctuation errors (capitalization of 'firstly' and 'on the other hand'). These errors are noticeable and occasionally distract the reader, though they do not completely impede communication. Increasing the variety of complex structures while focusing on basic grammatical accuracy will help improve this score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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