Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph provide the information about the Jobs availability in Manufacturing , Retail , Agricultural , Healthcare sectors in US economy between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Manufacturing held highest position in 1960 , However throughout the period showing a slightly more availability then sharply diminishing, whereas jobs in Healthcare sectors was lowest in Graph , after sometime its showing growth .

Manufacturing accounted for proportion almost 15 millions during 1960 , Unfortunately showing a dramatically fell throughout the period by 2020 , while Agriculture and Retail Department sector held same amount almost 5 Millions in Employment, respectively, whereas Healthcare Jobs in starting of 1960 was approximately 2-3 Millions.

Agricultural and Reata

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, as it is only 112 words long and ends abruptly mid-sentence. While you have identified some main features, such as the decline in manufacturing and the growth in healthcare, the analysis is incomplete. You have not provided a full overview of all sectors, and the lack of completion significantly impacts the ability to fully address the task. To improve, ensure you complete your sentences and provide a more comprehensive summary of the trends across all four sectors, ensuring you reach the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear structure. While there is an attempt at an introduction and an overview, the paragraphs are not well-developed, and the abrupt ending makes the overall progression unclear. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'However' and 'whereas', but they are sometimes used incorrectly or in a way that makes the flow mechanical. To improve, focus on creating distinct paragraphs for the introduction, overview, and body details, and ensure that your sentences are logically connected to guide the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive. You use basic terms like 'highest position' and 'lowest in Graph'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'Jobs availability' instead of 'job availability' and 'dramatically fell' instead of 'a dramatic fall'. Some terms are used inaccurately, such as 'Department sector'. To improve, try to use more precise vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'remained stable', and work on using nouns and verbs correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede communication. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('The line graph provide'), incorrect article usage ('in US economy'), and awkward phrasing ('after sometime its showing growth'). The sentence structures are mostly simple, and the attempt at complex structures is often faulty. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles. Proofreading for these common errors will help you achieve a higher score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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