Band 8.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 8.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 8.0)
Overall, manufacturing was the largest source of employment at the beginning of the period, but its figure declined substantially after reaching a peak in 1980. By contrast, employment in retail and healthcare increased considerably, with healthcare experiencing the most dramatic growth. Agriculture was the only other sector to decline, although its fall was less pronounced than that of manufacturing.
In 1960, manufacturing employed approximately 15 million people, compared with around 6 million in both retail and agriculture. Healthcare accounted for the smallest number of jobs, at only about 2 million. Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak of 20 million in 1980, before falling to roughly 17 million in 2000 and 13 million in 2020. Thus, despite remaining a major employer, manufacturing ultimately lost around 7 million jobs from its peak.
Retail, meanwhile, followed a consistently upward trajectory, increasing from 6 million jobs in 1960 to 10 million in 1980, before reaching 15 million in 2000 and approximately 16 million in 2020. Healthcare saw an even more striking rise, climbing from just 2 million jobs in 1960 to 5 million in 1980, 11 million in 2000 and 16 million by 2020. Agriculture moved in the opposite direction, falling from about 6 million jobs to 3 million between 1960 and 1980 and remaining at that level until 2000, before declining further to around 2 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 8.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 8.0 |
| Overall | 8.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.0
The response is excellent. You have successfully identified all key features of the graph, including the initial status, the peak of manufacturing, and the contrasting trends in the other sectors. The overview is clear and provides a concise summary of the main developments. You have effectively used data to support your points, such as the specific figures for healthcare and retail growth. The comparison between sectors is well-integrated, and the response fully satisfies the requirements of the task by providing a clear, accurate, and well-supported report.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The response is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. You have used paragraphing effectively to separate the overview from the detailed body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'By contrast', 'meanwhile', and 'despite' are used naturally to link ideas and show relationships between the data points. The flow of information is smooth, and each paragraph has a clear focus, which makes the report very easy to follow.
Lexical Resource — Band 7.5
You demonstrate a wide and precise range of vocabulary. Phrases such as 'consistently upward trajectory', 'dramatic growth', and 'pronounced' show a high level of lexical control. The vocabulary is used accurately and appropriately for an academic report. There are no noticeable errors in word choice or collocation, and the language used is sophisticated enough to convey the trends clearly and effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.0
The grammar is highly accurate throughout the response. You have used a variety of complex sentence structures, such as participial phrases ('climbing from just 2 million...') and subordinate clauses ('before falling to...'), with great control. Punctuation is used correctly to support the clarity of your sentences. The majority of your sentences are error-free, and the few structures used are handled with high precision, reflecting a strong command of English grammar.
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