Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrate the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 to 2020.

In 1960, the rate jobs in manufacturing sector is 15 which was increased in the year 1980 but in the year 2020, there was a dramatic decline. In the section of retail, it was above 6 and below 10 in the year 1960 then it reached its peak as it increased sharply in till the year 2020. Agricultural area was also higher than 6 in the year 1960 however it decreased rapidly up to the period 2020. On the other hand, Healthcare domain was below five after that it has raised significantly by the year 2020.

To summarise this, we have seen ups and downs in the all 4 field starting from the year 1960 to the end 2020. There were sudden rise and thereafter major drop.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers all four sectors mentioned in the graph, but the analysis is quite superficial. While you identify the starting and ending points, you fail to provide specific data points or meaningful comparisons between the sectors. For example, stating the manufacturing sector was '15' lacks units (e.g., millions of jobs), and the description of trends is vague. To reach a higher band, you must select key features and support them with accurate data from the graph, rather than just describing the general direction of the lines. The summary paragraph is also too generic and does not synthesize the information effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into three paragraphs, which is a standard structure for Task 1. However, the logical flow between sentences is weak. You rely on basic transitions like 'In 1960' and 'On the other hand,' but the progression of ideas within paragraphs feels disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes mechanical. For instance, the final summary paragraph is repetitive and does not add new insight or effectively link the previous information. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear focus would improve the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive. You use basic verbs like 'increased,' 'decreased,' and 'raised' repeatedly. There is little attempt to use more sophisticated or precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated,' 'plummeted,' or 'surpassed.' Additionally, there are word-choice errors, such as 'rate jobs' instead of 'number of jobs' and 'in the section of retail' instead of 'in the retail sector.' To improve, you should focus on learning topic-specific collocations and synonyms for describing trends to avoid repetitive phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally hinder clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('The line graph illustrate'), incorrect preposition usage ('increased in the year 1980'), and awkward phrasing ('it reached its peak as it increased sharply in till the year 2020'). The sentence structures are mostly simple, with few attempts at complex sentences. When complex structures are attempted, they often contain errors. You need to focus on basic sentence construction, verb tense consistency, and ensuring that your subjects and verbs agree.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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