Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The chart below illustrate the proportion of jobs in four sectors in the time period between 1960 to 2020 in US.

In health care sector the number of jobs gradually increases in every year.In constract,the number of jobs decreases gradually in agriculture sector.

In manufacturing sector there is inrease of jobs which leads to around 20 million in 1980 after that there seems to be decrease in jobs and it reaches to 17 billion in 2000 and then it decreases to less than 15 million in 2020. Retail sector achievement is in number second after the heathcare sector it starts from 5 billion jobs and reaches to 10 billion in 1980 and then its further reaches to 15 billion in 2000 and then its speeds decreases and it reaches to 16 billion in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have identified some main features, the analysis is superficial and lacks a clear overview of the overall trends. Furthermore, there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting; for example, you mention '17 billion' and '16 billion' when the graph clearly refers to millions. The lack of a clear summary and the failure to meet the length requirement prevent a higher score. To improve, ensure you provide a concise overview of the main trends and double-check your data points against the provided graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is organized into short, somewhat disjointed paragraphs. While there is a basic attempt at logical progression, the use of cohesive devices is very limited and often mechanical (e.g., 'In constract', 'and then'). The lack of clear paragraphing and the repetitive sentence structure make the flow of information feel choppy. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more fluidly, and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus, such as grouping sectors by their growth or decline trends.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic terms like 'increase' and 'decrease'. There are also errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'constract' (contrast) and 'inrease' (increase). The misuse of units (billions instead of millions) suggests a lack of attention to detail. To improve, try to incorporate a wider range of synonyms for trends, such as 'fluctuate', 'decline', 'climb', or 'plateau', and ensure you use the correct units of measurement as specified in the task prompt.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'The chart below illustrate') and missing articles (e.g., 'in health care sector'). Sentence structures are simple and repetitive, with little evidence of complex sentence forms. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and periods. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, including correct subject-verb agreement and the appropriate use of articles. Additionally, practice combining simple sentences into more complex structures using relative clauses or subordinating conjunctions.

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