Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates proportion of jobs among four sectors of economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is immediately clear that manufacturing industry had most jobs in starting year after a surge it kept dipping. Meanwhile, Agriculture sector that had the lowest number rose gradually through out the years.

In 1960, number of jobs recorded for Manufacturing was 15 million far more than any other sector in this year it peaked at 20 million in 1980. However, this number kept dropping and was observed 13 million in 2020. Furthermore, Healthcare had roughly 6 million jobs in 1960. This number fell to 4 million in 1980 remained same for 2020 and after a slight drop in 2020 remained 2 million.

There was dramatic increase in jobs for agriculture as well as healthcare. Agriculture at 2 million and health care from 6 million in 1960 plummeted up to 16 million in terms of jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main features of the graph, but there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting. For example, you state that Healthcare fell to 4 million and then to 2 million, which contradicts the visual data showing a clear upward trend for that sector. Additionally, the final sentence claims Agriculture and Healthcare both reached 16 million, which is confusing and inaccurate based on the provided graph. While you identify the main trends, the failure to accurately report the figures and the contradictory information provided hinder the task achievement. To improve, ensure that your data points are carefully checked against the graph and that your descriptions of trends are logically consistent.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the logical progression is frequently interrupted by confusing data reporting. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Meanwhile', 'However', and 'Furthermore', the transitions between ideas are sometimes mechanical or unclear. For instance, the transition in the final paragraph is abrupt and the information provided is contradictory, making it difficult to follow the intended comparison. Improving the logical flow between sentences and ensuring that cohesive devices are used to connect related ideas more effectively would improve this score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'illustrates', 'proportion', 'surge', 'dipping', and 'plummeted'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'starting year' instead of 'base year' or 'initial year'. Additionally, the misuse of terms like 'plummeted' (which implies a sharp decrease) to describe an upward trend in agriculture is a significant error. While your vocabulary is sufficient to convey the general topic, more precision is needed to accurately describe the trends shown in the graph.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with article usage (e.g., 'in starting year', 'in 1960, number of jobs'), subject-verb agreement, and tense consistency. Some sentences are fragmented or lack necessary prepositions, which occasionally makes the meaning unclear. While the errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to affect the overall clarity of your writing. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy, such as the correct use of articles and consistent verb tenses, will help you achieve a higher band score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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