Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph below illustrates the four different job sectors across the US from year 1960 to 2020.
The line graph depicts the Manufacturing sector grabs the highest threshold among four other sectors making it the highest contributed in 1980 and for around 20 million jobs , after this the line graph for manufacturing showed a slighter downward trend of nearly 3 percent after each two decades. While Retail shows some minimum growth throughout each interval of 20 years nearly around five percent.
On the other hand Agriculture and healthcare sectors are quite different from one another , In healthcare a heavy incline trend showed from 1960 of 2 percent and later it marked the highest remarkable growth from 1960 to 2020. Whereas economy for agriculture examines the lowest growth to a very median to decreased range .
In contrast , healthcare and retail both records the same percentage of job openings from nearly 5 percent growth to 15 last recorded.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features of the graph, but the analysis is often unclear or inaccurate. For instance, the description of the manufacturing sector as having a 'highest threshold' is vague, and the claim that it contributed 20 million jobs in 1980 is not clearly supported by the data provided. Furthermore, the report lacks a clear overview or summary of the overall trends, which is essential for Task 1. The comparisons between sectors are often confusing, such as the statement about agriculture having a 'median to decreased range,' which is difficult to interpret. To improve, focus on identifying clear trends (e.g., upward/downward) and using specific data points to support your observations.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression of ideas is weak. While there are some attempts at cohesive devices like 'On the other hand' and 'In contrast,' they are often used incorrectly or do not effectively link the ideas. For example, the transition 'In contrast, healthcare and retail both records the same percentage' contradicts the use of 'In contrast,' as the sentence describes a similarity rather than a difference. The referencing is also occasionally unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between the four sectors. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear focus would enhance the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and sometimes inaccurate, which hinders the clarity of the report. Phrases like 'grabs the highest threshold,' 'heavy incline trend,' and 'median to decreased range' are non-standard and do not accurately describe the data. There is also a lack of variety in the language used to describe trends, with repetitive use of basic terms. To reach a higher band, you should learn and apply specific collocations for describing graphs, such as 'experienced a significant decline,' 'showed a steady upward trend,' or 'remained relatively stable.' Expanding your range of descriptive verbs and adjectives will help you convey information more precisely.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Retail shows,' 'healthcare and retail both records'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward sentence structures (e.g., 'making it the highest contributed in 1980'). While there is an attempt to use complex sentences, they are often poorly constructed or contain errors. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the placement of commas and spaces. Focusing on basic sentence construction and ensuring subject-verb agreement would significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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