Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four sections of the economy in the US between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the number of jobs in manufacturing gradually decreased after its peak. The jobs in retail and healthcare gradually increased with time. In agriculture, jobs gradually decreased with time.

The job in manufacturing increased from 15 to 20 million in 1960 to 1980. In 1980s, it decreased to 16 million in 2000s. After that gradually decreased to 13 million in 2020. In retail, jobs increased from 5 to 10 million from 1960 to 1980. It further increased to 15 million in 2000. It reached 16 million in 2020.

In the agriculture sector, jobs decreased from 5 to 3 million from 1960 to 1980. It remained the same in 2000. After that is decreased to 2 million in 2020. The jobs in healthcare increased from 3 to 5 million from 1960 to 1980. After that is gradually increased to 10 million in 2000. After that it reached to 16 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends. However, the overview is somewhat simplistic and lacks a clear synthesis of the data. While the key features are mentioned, the reporting of figures is occasionally repetitive and lacks variety in how the data is presented. To reach a higher band, ensure the overview highlights the most significant trends—such as the dramatic rise in healthcare compared to the decline in agriculture—rather than just listing the direction of change for each sector individually.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is organized into logical paragraphs, with each sector discussed in a dedicated section. However, the use of cohesive devices is quite mechanical and repetitive. Phrases like 'After that' are used at the beginning of almost every sentence in the final paragraph, which disrupts the flow. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words and transition phrases (e.g., 'subsequently', 'following this', 'in contrast', or 'meanwhile') to connect ideas more fluidly and reduce the reliance on simple temporal markers.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks sophistication. The student relies heavily on basic verbs like 'increased', 'decreased', and 'remained'. While these are accurate, they are used repeatedly without variation. There is little attempt to use less common lexical items or precise collocations related to data description. To improve, incorporate more descriptive language to characterize the trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'experienced a steady decline', or 'surpassed'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent minor errors. For example, 'After that is decreased' should be 'After that, it decreased', and 'The job in manufacturing' should be plural ('jobs'). Additionally, there are issues with preposition usage and article omission. While these errors do not impede communication, they are persistent throughout the text. Increasing the variety of complex structures and proofreading for subject-verb agreement and article usage would significantly improve the score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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