Band 8.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 8.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 8.5)

The line graph illustrates changes in employment levels (in millions) across four key economic sectors in the United States - Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare - from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, manufacturing and agriculture experienced a long-term decline in jobs, while healthcare showed consistent growth. Retail employment rose steadily until around 2000 before plateauing and slightly declining thereafter.

In 1960, manufacturing was the largest employer among the four sectors, with approximately 15 million jobs. It peaked at around 20 million in 1980, after which it declined steadily to roughly 13 million by 2020. In contrast, agriculture started with about 6 million jobs in 1960 and fell sharply to just under 2 million by 2020 - a reduction of over two-thirds.

Healthcare began with the fewest jobs (around 2 million) in 1960 but demonstrated uninterrupted growth, rising to approximately 16 million by 2020 - surpassing manufacturing as the largest sector by the end of the period. Retail employment grew from about 6 million in 1960 to 15 million in 2020, though its trajectory was not linear: it increased steadily until 2000 (reaching ~15 million), then levelled off and dipped slightly to 15.5 million by 2020 - still higher than in 1960 but marginally below its 2000 peak.

Notably, healthcare overtook retail around 2010 and surpassed manufacturing by 2020, reflecting a structural shift toward service- and care-based employment in the US economy over the six decades

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.5

The response is excellent. You have successfully identified all key trends, including the long-term decline in manufacturing and agriculture, the steady rise of healthcare, and the fluctuating trajectory of retail. The overview is clear and effectively synthesises the main features of the data. You have made relevant comparisons, such as noting that healthcare surpassed manufacturing by the end of the period. The data is accurately reported, and the inclusion of specific figures supports your analysis well. You have fully addressed all parts of the task, providing a comprehensive summary that highlights the structural shift in the US economy.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.5

The response is logically organised, with a clear introduction, a concise overview, and two well-structured body paragraphs that group the data by sector trends. Cohesive devices are used naturally and effectively, such as 'In contrast', 'though its trajectory was not linear', and 'Notably'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different trends, and the progression of ideas is smooth throughout the text. There is no evidence of mechanical or repetitive use of linking words, and the referencing is clear and precise.

Lexical Resource — Band 8.5

You demonstrate a wide and sophisticated range of vocabulary, which is used with high precision. Phrases such as 'uninterrupted growth', 'structural shift', and 'trajectory was not linear' show a strong command of academic language. Collocations are natural, and there are no errors in word choice. You successfully use varied terminology to describe trends, such as 'plateauing', 'dipped', and 'surpassed', which enhances the readability and professional tone of the report. The vocabulary is perfectly suited to the task.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.5

The writing exhibits a wide range of complex structures used with full flexibility and accuracy. You effectively combine simple and complex sentences to maintain a good flow. Punctuation is used correctly to manage clauses and lists. There are no grammatical errors, and the control over tense and subject-verb agreement is flawless. The sentence structures are varied, and the overall accuracy is very high, reflecting a level of proficiency that is consistent with the highest band descriptors.

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